Month: March 2011

Change My Heart, O God

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My Pastor is teaching a series entitled “Excellence of Ministry – Why Do We Need to Press?”  I’ve given members of the Music Ministry weekly assignments that correspond to the teaching.  As a leader, I’ve chosen to complete the assignments, too.  Here is my homework response for the third week…be honest as you challenge yourself to earnestly ask the title question.

During Sunday morning’s sermon, I heard the song “He Wants It All Today” running through my head.  All – that’s so encompassing, Lord.  Everything?  Yes, everything.  Even that?  Yes child, even that.  Especially that.

After thinking I’d already given up soooo much (but not unto dying on a cross!), God pointed out something else I need to release to Him.  News flash – this isn’t “press out” week…so I thought.  Reverse News Flash:  EVERY DAY is “press out” day!  Truthfully, it’s not that hard to release this one; I just have to DO IT.  He won’t have to pry it out of my stiff fingers – I am willingly placing it on the altar in obedience to the Lord…because I don’t want anything to block my communication with Him.

Background:  I really enjoy watching suspense shows – anything with undercover spies, double agents, conspiracies, mystery, government cover-ups…they all intrigue me.  With two young children, I don’t spend a ton of time watching TV to begin with…and when I do, it’s usually cartoons.  So when I found “Nikita” (a remake of “La Femme Nikita,” one of my favorite spy-thriller action shows from “back in the day”), I set the DVR to record it.  I was so excited!  One hour a week, for one season, that’s not so bad, right?  I’d even convinced myself that I was using good stewardship (yay – Seven Spiritual Principles!) by fast-forwarding through the commercials…it wouldn’t even take me a whole hour to watch it.  Yeah, right!

This past week, I watched the 4th episode of the new season.  A key undercover agent was now “on the outside” of the training compound (yes, trained to be a violent mercenary, killing a few people “for the greater good of humanity”).  One line from her superiors kept resonating, “Live the lie until the lie becomes your life.”  Now even though that premise makes sense for a spy, I knew I couldn’t receive that as truth.  But I pushed that line out of my way through 4 episodes because I wanted to see “what’s gonna happen next.”  The story line was about to get more complex because she was interacting with people – including her male apartment complex neighbor – who didn’t know she was an undercover agent.  Well, Episode 4 ended with her “getting closer” with her male neighbor.  Sure, they had clothes on, but I knew where this was going – and I couldn’t go there.  I sighed, knowing in the back of my mind (and from that tugging feeling in my gut), that I wasn’t gonna be able to watch this every week.  Not if I wanted to effectively minister to the Lord.  This was nothing more than a nighttime soap opera in disguise, packaged with sophisticated weapons and a better script.  It was gonna consume my time – and my mind – if I allowed it to.

Over the course of YEARS, God has delivered me from lust (and from being gripped by the addictions and hang-ups that accompany that spirit).  So why would I want to flirt with watching a program where folks are OBVIOUSLY fornicating?  I tried to rationalize, “It’s not THAT bad, right?  It’s on prime-time network TV – not even cable!  And there’s no cussin’!”  But is it righteous?  Um, no.  Then I countered, “They’re not showing anything, and I’m watching it for the suspense plot, not to see somebody’s skin!”  And the Holy Spirit gently admonished, “But what thoughts are being planted in your mind by the enemy during that time?”  Hmm…I didn’t have a quick (or legitimate) comeback for that one either.  If I made allowances for this area of my flesh in 1Q2011, what else might I consent to down the road?

News Flash:  Married people have to deal with lust, too.  Just because you’re married does NOT mean that issue goes away if you don’t #1) deal with it, and #2) get delivered from it.

As a wife and mother who works hard to fulfill both roles in excellence, I know that I deserve “me time.”  But I can’t fill my “me time” with stuff that doesn’t build me spiritually.  If I continue to watch this program, it will erode my spiritual foundation.  In the 90s, I used to watch Ally McBeal, a lawyer comedy on Fox; I liked the witty dialogue.  However, after a couple of seasons, it progressed from men and women colleagues using a unisex bathroom to an on-screen kiss between two women.  Needless to say, that was the end of me watching Ally McBeal.

Why would I want to compromise my witness with a gray area, thinking I could “get over” because of perceived “special grace” or exemption from total, complete, and utter obedience?  If I wouldn’t watch this program with my children in the room, why should I allow my own spirit to be subjected to trash?  I’m not a garbage can, so I can’t allow rubbish to reside in the place where I’m inviting and expecting God to dwell.  For a couple of days, I thought about deleting this program from the “auto-record” function on my DVR.  I wasn’t expecting God to change His mind, I guess it just felt so FINAL – after all, I’d set it to record the whole season!  I pulled the plug on Tuesday, making no provision for the devil, “Oh, it recorded this week, I’ll just watch it this one last time…”

So did I make it an idol?  Not yet.  But I have a sneaking suspicion that this will prevent the program from ever attaining idol status in my life.  And for that I’m grateful.  Because God knows what’s best for me.  And He knows my inner workings, triggers, hidden places, and weaknesses – because He made me.  He created me for HIS glory – not to incubate and meditate on the ideas of the world system.

Since I deliberately chose to stand up to compromise in my own life, the Holy Spirit sharpened my discernment in other areas of my influence.  While I was in another room while listening to my son do his 20 minutes of reading in the living room, my ears perked up to hear him say “vampire” and “magic wand.”  Exqueeze me?!?  What business does a 2nd grader (or anyone, for that matter) have reading about vampires???  I went in to investigate, then used it as a teachable moment to fortify our foundation of faith.   Now consider:  What kind of hypocritical witness would that have been for me to tell my child to put away that ungodly storybook, if I knew that – once a week – I’d be spending time with my neatly tucked-away little secret?  Not that the show’s so terrible – because we can CERTAINLY find worse things on TV, but God told me to let it go.  I would’ve been ineffective and powerless until I got rid of the accursed thing from my own camp (Joshua 7).  God’s not tolerating foolishness or lukewarmness.  It’s time out for us telling other folk to “do right” when we ain’t doin’ right ourselves!

Lord, please cleanse me so I don’t desire to partake of anything that’s an affront to Your holiness, purity, and righteousness.  Do I truly hate sin, or just have a mild dislike for it?  I don’t want to offend, insult, disrespect, or anger You – the One Who made the supreme sacrifice for me.  I am Your servant, here to do YOUR good pleasure.  Change my heart, O God…

“Who shall ascend into the hill of the LORD? or who shall stand in his holy place?

He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully.

He shall receive the blessing from the LORD, and righteousness from the God of his salvation.”

(Psalm 24:3-5)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Science Fair Project: Midpoint Progress Report

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Well, we survived yet another phase in the ongoing saga of 2nd Grade Science Fair Projectdom.  Go on – I dare you to ask me why some materials float and why others don’t…

After 3 protracted hours of internet research, draft writing, and re-writing (yes, it could’ve been done in 1 hour if he hadn’t dragged it out), my son prayed during the grace over his hard-earned dinner, “Thank You Lord for helping me to finish my Science Fair Project Progress Report even though I waited until the last minute…”  I froze; he actually got the concept we were trying to drill into his precious little head!  He met the deadline, but we are working to teach him that you have to do a little bit each week so it’s not overwhelming and stressful at the last minute.

Perhaps most touching of all was when my son said at the conclusion of our Google research session, “I couldn’t have done it without you, Mom.”  You betcha, son…you betcha.  But being there for him is my job – and I’m committed to it, just like God is committed to taking care of us as His children.  He is a loving and gracious Father.  Have you thanked Him today for the grace and mercy He has shown in your life?

“Take, my brethren, the prophets, who have spoken in the name of the Lord, for an example of suffering affliction, and of patience.

Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy.”

(James 5:10-11)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The Truth About Time Management – Plain and Simple

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Note:  There’s a tangible gift that follows reading through this entire entry.  You can skip to the bottom immediately and click the link if you must, but the background information will help prepare your heart to receive what God has for you.  Blessings to you, Kayren

Sometimes the truth hurts.  Sometimes it cuts like a knife.  Other times, it burns like fire.  My friend, whatever it feels like, rest assured that change – in some way, shape, or form – is coming.  Many folks call truth cold, harsh, ugly, or brutal.  However, there’s something liberating about truth:  you are free to move forward in victory after what was hidden has been exposed, because there are no more secrets.

We often marvel in awe, amazement, and admiration at folks who wear multiple hats (on just one head) and juggle numerous roles (that leave little time to breathe, let alone time to stop and smell the roses).  In spite of their appearance that they’ve “got it all together,” we don’t see their lack of inner peace or their soul’s cry for rest.  We merely see the cloud of dust kicked up by constant activity…but is it true productivity?  After much experience and observation – during my time as a single person, and as a wife and working mother – I would assert that we’re praising a façade that’s just not real or sustainable.

Through the years (yes, over a decade), I’ve attended numerous time management workshops, had one-on-one sessions with professional life coaches and personal accountability partners, and resolved to make it different this time – seemingly to no avail.  I’ve started (and subsequently stopped prior to completion) various projects – more than I care to admit.  Recently, I had a moment of revelation as I surveyed piles of notebooks containing clever things I’ve yet to publish.  I share it with you in yet another moment of exposure and transparency, hoping that my self-disclosure will help someone break free of the enemy’s trap of bondage.

Poor time management is an indication of stewardship issues.  It’s saying “I want it all…even though I’m not in a position to handle what I’ve already got.”  Not only is it placing my own priorities higher than God’s will, but it’s actively choosing to bury in the ground a precious commodity that wasn’t mine to keep in the first place.  How dare I squander God’s gifts?  Of time, talent, substance, ability, energy…conviction and repentance set in as I lament what could’ve already been completed and accomplished by merely following God’s plan instead of trying to rationalize and figure out how to execute my own plan!

So I’ve been sowing disorganization and complacency, only to reap slothfulness and discontentment with the status quo.  Wow.  To admit this is one thing, but to take steps in the opposite direction to change it is quite another thing.  One nugget of wisdom that lifted my head this week was a radio teacher noting that some seeds remain dormant for a whole year before becoming productive.  And I know it’s high time for mature saints to start producing fruit.

Poor time management is a symptom of disobedience.  I never saw it this way until I realized all the “to do” lists I’d accumulated through days, weeks, and months of putting off things I thought were simply “good ideas.”  Most of them were instructions from the Lord.  And if I’d completed them WHEN He told me to, I wouldn’t have this overwhelmed feeling of being “behind” and playing catch-up from procrastination.  See, I’m very aware that delayed obedience = disobedience.  But I wasn’t walking in that truth; I was making excuses and creating illusory loopholes for myself.  Until today.

Hence, here I am with a major “productivity undertaking” for the new year to commence walking in the right direction (God’s direction!):  I am posting for your perusal a link to the eBook version of Court Etiquette: Approaching the King’s Throne, my inspirational daily devotional published several years ago.  My gift to you – it’s FREE!  Please visit the link to my inspirational eBook on Smashwords.com and, if you’re so inclined, let me know what God speaks to your heart.  It’s important to realize that others are waiting on our obedience.  I pray that you are blessed as a result of my obedience, and that you choose to walk in His will this year like never before.

Your sister in Christ,

Kayren

Court Etiquette eBook by Kayren J. Cathcart

Inspirational daily devotional

p.s.  At the Holy Spirit’s nudging, I prepared much of this verbiage in January 2011, before I knew my paperback publisher would be closing its doors.  When I submitted Court Etiquette for eBook publication, it took a little longer than I expected, but now it’s ready and available – yeah, more process!  Please share with others…thanks!

“For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.”

(Philippians 2:13)

“That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God;”

(Colossians 1:10)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The Flip Side: What Am I Allowing God to Press INTO Me?

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My Pastor is teaching a series entitled “Excellence of Ministry – Why Do We Need to Press?”  I’ve given members of the Music Ministry weekly assignments that correspond to the teaching.  As a leader, I’ve chosen to complete the assignments, too.  Here is my homework response for the second week…be honest as you challenge yourself to answer the title question. 

Obedience at the moment I hear His voice, not just waiting until I feel like it.  “Feeling like it” may never come…leading to procrastination and other delays, deferments, and distractions.

In the past, I’ve talked about it, agonized over it, had angst about it…but now, it’s time to DO IT!  What is “it?” Whatever He says.  I used to sort and classify things into categories by desirability, ease of completion, and my perception of how urgent it was to complete the task at hand – those were my unspoken mental criteria.

  • So to replace slothfulness, I’m allowing God to press DILIGENCE into me.
  • For my inconsistency based on feelings and circumstances, I’m allowing God to press HIS CONSISTENCY and FAITHFULNESS (reliability, dependability, stability, steadiness) into me.
  • Every time I consider putting off something “just for a few minutes,” I’m learning the “forced behavior” of DO IT NOW.  (i.e., Loading the dishwasher right after finishing dinner instead of “sitting down” first, biting the bullet and cleaning the bathroom now instead of waiting for the weekend, or not snoozing the alarm on my online calendar when it pops up a reminder task).  Because little things add up into a big mountain over time.  Speaking of which…
  • Instead of keeping and holding onto inconsequential “stuff,” I’m learning to LET IT GO.  This is working for physical clutter as well as emotional baggage.

 I’ve written about many of my issues in my blog – now, it’s just time to do it:  OBEY.  I’m allowing God to press OBEDIENCE to His will into me.  It is a flesh-killing experience that’s often unpleasant, requires sacrifice, and is unconcerned for my personal comfort.  But it’s necessary if I am to reflect His character.

How can I expect Him to multiply the work of my hands and make me fruitful if I’m not working, being lethargic, idle, and lazy…just delaying the inevitable?  I don’t have the false luxury of saying, “Yes Lord, I’ll do it…in a minute!”  That’s ridiculous, and it’s time out for me playing with HIS resources – including air to breathe, good health, loving family, time that HE loaned me on the earth, etc.

“That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God;”

(Colossians 1:10)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

What Am I Allowing God to Press OUT of Me?

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My Pastor is teaching a series entitled “Excellence of Ministry – Why Do We Need to Press?”  I’ve given members of the Music Ministry weekly assignments that correspond to the teaching.  As a leader, I’ve chosen to complete the assignments, too.  Here is my homework response for the first week…be honest as you challenge yourself to answer the title question. 

Where to begin?!  Oh so many issues come to mind that God is dealing with me about, but perhaps they are just surface symptoms of a deeper root cause…

Thinking I have options when I really do not.  Then I put things off.  Then weeks, months, years later, they’re still undone.  Not intending to procrastinate, but getting easily distracted from the task at hand…the list goes on and on.

What am I allowing God to press out of me?  Not putting Christ first with my time.  It’s not that I’m not working for Him – because I am.  I believe He’s quite pleased that I take my responsibility of having a husband and two children seriously, because my first ministry is home.  I believe He is honored that I am actively working my ministry at church, and I’m engaged with the Body of Christ and fellowshipping with my brothers and sisters.  Outside of home and church, I intentionally live my life in a way that my witness speaks (without words) that I have a relationship with Jesus.  I want people to see a woman of integrity who doesn’t put herself in questionable or “gray” situations.  I make myself available to encourage others in their walk with Christ.  So where am I missing the mark?

Is He first, primary, chief, initial, principal, foremost, top?  Does He get the daily Quiet Time with me He so desires with me daily?  Sadly, no.  I’m completely inconsistent with it.  My mouth says, “Lord, I love You!”  But looking at the way my day is spent doesn’t always include dedicated time in the Word or being quiet long enough to hear the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit.  Which inevitably leads to me taking on too many tasks, doing things first that aren’t the highest priority, and being disorganized or just downright out of order.  All because I didn’t hear – then heed – His instructions for that day.

Meditating on His Word in the car is good.  I believe He’s glad I do that.  But it’s like living on appetizers; at some point, you’re going to need nourishment from a balanced meal.  So I’ve been snacking on snippets of sermons during my commute instead of taking time to dig into His Word for myself.  Like the Good Shepherd that He is, He has continued to feed me.  But I’m mature enough to be able to get some meat for myself instead of relying on fajita skewers someone else has prepared.

And so the press comes to correct me.  Repeatedly.  Since this is something I’ve dealt with for years, maybe He wants to remove it completely instead of watching me continue to nurse a wound that scabs over, then I hide it under clothing instead of allowing it to heal completely – from His expert touch.  So I guess that’s me presumptuously thinking I know better than God for my life.  Is that ridiculous?  Extremely.  Does that make me disobedient?  Yes.  Am I repentant?  Absolutely.  Will I do something different this week?  I already have – starting now.  Because “not being a morning person” is neither a valid, legitimate, nor acceptable excuse for a soldier in the army of the Lord not reporting to get the day’s marching orders.

“I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you.”

(Philippians 3:14-15)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

French Press for Dummies

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With all of the “how-to” books written on a remedial level to help the simplicity-challenged, I propose a new title:  French Press for Dummies.  Why, you may ask?  It’s a funny thing…

I’m not a big coffee person (I prefer cocoa), but since my hubby is, I make his coffee in the morning so he doesn’t have to dish out budget-zapping change to SBUX or McD’s.  Being the deal-seeker that I am, I got a big ol’ vat o’ Folgers when it was on sale at the grocery store…only to realize (too late – at home) that it was on sale for cheap because it wasn’t instant coffee.  And I’d broken the pot to the coffeemaker many moons ago.  So what was I to do with all of this coffee and no machine?

It took a friend with a law degree to unpuzzle me.  She recommended a French press for getting some use (and tastier coffee) out of those grounds.  I’d never heard of one, but she told me it was really simple to use.  I like simple (a LOT), so I gave her money…and within a week, she’d found one for under $5 – great, right?  Wrong – I was befuddled and my hubby was caffeine-deprived for several days.  My quandary?  The Folgers directions gave measurements for preparing a 6 oz. cup of coffee.  The French press gizmo directions gave measurements for “1 scoop per 4 oz. of water.”  Powerless to reconcile the ratio of water to coffee grounds, I was stuck.  As in “fork in the road, don’t know which way I’m going, and my written directions just flew outta the sunroof – so I’ll just pull over on the side of the road until I figure out what to do next” stuck.  (Yes, that really happened to me – I’m directionally-challenged, too…but that’s another story for another day).  With my inability to convert simple math for a cup o’ joe, you wouldn’t think I work at a bank, right?  Or these days, maybe you would.  Nevertheless…

When she came to visit me about 2 weeks after she’d givien me the French press, I sheepishly admitted my ignorance and confessed that I’d been terrified to do it wrong, so I hadn’t made any coffee with it yet.  She patiently illuminated the process (by telling me to go with the Folgers directions), and I was happy to finally make 8 oz. of coffee quite easily – whew!  Yay – problem solved!  And it was tastier than instant coffee, so it was worth the wait.

Why do we get frustrated when we don’t know what’s coming next?  Do we have a problem asking for help?  Will it really hurt to admit that we don’t know everything?  We are “in the press” because God is always at work in His children. Let us continue to allow Him to press us for His glory.

p.s.  A special shout out to my “smarty pants” sistahfriend in the blogosphere – the highest-paid corporate barista out there!  No shame if they ask you to get their coffee even though you have a graduate degree.  Just laugh all the way to the bank while you provide service with a smile.  If they wanna pay multiple thousands of dollars a year for someone to get their coffee, who are we to question?!

“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”

(Philippians 3:13-14)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart