Need a good laugh?
Here’s one at my expense – for free! Enjoy…
Perhaps I’ve been watching too much
Perry Mason, Law & Order, and NCIS? Nah!!!
7:30am – After getting up a little later than expected, I had an impromptu breakfast plan for this morning. It hinged on a baked potato I’d microwaved 2 days prior and stored in a plastic baggie with a twist tie. As I packed my lunch bag, the aforementioned potato was not on the shelf where I’d carefully placed it in plain sight the night before, and it was nowhere to be found. More than a little irritated, I hastily pivoted to grapes, tangerines, and a banana as my breakfast fill-ins.
The short list of potato-nabbing suspects is limited to my housemates. Granted, since each one is committed to helping me get over my recent GI disturbances, any of them could have tossed my tater in an effort to “keep mom healthy because she doesn’t like to throw stuff away before it’s too late for her own good.” In no particular order, here’s my take on the offender likelihood status of my immediate family members (names have been withheld to protect the not-so-innocent):
- Suspicious Side-eye: Apt to have done it and not remember. Whether telling the truth or not, his shifty glance belies that “teen angel” face and usually makes him suspect in my mind.
- Slim Shady: Sneaky enough to pull it off, cover her tracks, and then boldly declare that it’s MY fault the potato is missing. I gotta keep an eye on that Little Miss Think I Know It All chick…
- Supreme Sith: Unapologetic about the outcome whether he did it or not, no worries consciously or not, intentionally or not… and dispassionate about the infinite valid reasons behind my lament.
Who was the real perp? Short of dusting my fridge and trash can for fingerprints, we may never know. I guess I’ll just have to learn to let it go and not say anything further, since nothing will bring back that elusive missing tuber. I’ll keep you posted on how that angle develops…
5:30pm – Of course I didn’t pass the “don’t say nothing” test (drat! I tried, but it was too irresistible to try and solve this conundrum of a caper with an improvised interrogation), but neither child owned up to seeing/touching/moving or otherwise knowing anything about my potato. I dared not ask my husband about something so trivial as he walked through the door after a long workday. So I tried once again to “let it go,” while the wonderings wandered through my mind as I cooked.
Breaking News Alert: One missing potato has been reunited with its owner at the end of the workday. The flustered woman who reported the missing tater (and is known for similar tirades when only one sock comes out of the dryer without its mate) was filled with relief when she located it behind the almond milk (of all places) while putting away dinner leftovers. Reportedly, an unknown party moved it from its rightful place on the bottom shelf to the hidden hinterland behind several cartons on the top shelf (who does that?!? Small things should ALWAYS go in front LOL). We’re delighted to call this case CLOSED; the owner plans a celebratory potato breakfast tomorrow morning! Alas, this is a great reminder to extend grace to those near and dear to you instead of jumping to hasty conclusions. Especially if it’s just a potato! 😊
“25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.
26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.”
(Mark 11:25-26)
“8 Either what woman having ten pieces of silver,
if she lose one piece, doth not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it?
9 And when she hath found it, she calleth her friends and her neighbours together, saying, Rejoice with me; for I have found the piece which I had lost.”
(Luke 15:8-9)
© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart