children

Success = Consistent Progress (and vice versa)

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I have each child’s report card in front of me, and I‘m so proud that both of them received straight 3s (consistently meets expectations) for all 4 consecutive quarters of the school year!  Not that it was easy, but my hubby and I kept prodding them, and they kept pressing.  Their stellar report cards (along with quarterly awards recognition for Academic Excellence, Exemplary Citizenship, Perfect Attendance, and Accelerated Reader) provide an accurate reflection of the hard work they did all year long.

As a self-described “artistic type,” I had great disdain for consistency in my younger years; truthfully, I thought it was boring.  However, maturity has taught me that some achievements only come as a result of consistent effort and execution.  I relied too heavily on chance or being fortunate when I could’ve been assured of my outcome from the beginning if I’d been willing to do the same thing each time – start early (instead of waiting until the last minute), take time to study and do research (instead of cramming and flying by the seat of my pants on what I thought sounded good), and apply myself consistently (instead of being sporadic, unpredictable, and driven by whatever mood I happened to be in).

Funny how it took my own children in elementary school to drive this lesson home to me, but I’ve finally “got it” and I understand the importance of consistency.  I believe God uses our children to help bring us to where we need to be.  There was no way I could help my son do well with his Science Fair project if I didn’t face my own anxiety over the subjects of Math and Science.  I really can’t stand to dust and ironing is a foreign concept (though I love to vacuum), but that matters not since I’m responsible for training my children in proper housekeeping techniques.  So in order to accurately demonstrate the skills and provide a credible example, I have to get over myself.  May we as parents and leaders be ever mindful of the critical role we play in developing those following in our footsteps.

Congratulations to all graduates celebrating the fruit of your labor – job well done!  Be richly blessed as you advance to the next level of applying yourself to be excellent in Christ.  🙂

“Only be thou strong and very courageous, that thou mayest observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest prosper withersoever thou goest.

 This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.”

(Joshua 1:7-8)

“I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”

(Philippians 3:14)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The End is Near vs. Emergency Preparedness and Staying Ready

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This title was brewing in my spirit all day, but from a different perspective (think recent apocalyptic prophecies and wild weather epidemics).  However, the way I spent my last 2 hours was the icing on the proverbial cake.  Just what was I doing, you might inquire?  Teaching ALGEBRA to my 2nd grader for his homework sheet due TOMORROW.  Eeeek!!!  Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggghhhh!!!   The end surely must be near…

“And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?”

(Matthew 27:46)

As if enduring the torture of working on a science fair project over several months of my adult life wasn’t penance enough (I guess it wasn’t), I had to face yet another one of my idiosyncratic hang-ups from the high school/college years:  math phobia.  Yes, I know I’ve worked at a bank for 8 years.  Yes, I’ve finally learned to TRULY balance my checkbook within the past 2 years.   Yes, I’m acutely aware that my God has a sense of humor second to none.  See, I’ve always been the liberal artsy type – the KHS TV/Radio Club President (geez, I’m dating myself – that was in the early 90s…before the term “media” became savvy), the show choir song ‘n’ dance gal, the Speech Communications major extraordinaire, the one whose “gift of gab” helped get her outta many a sticky situation. 

Yet, here I sat at MY kitchen table with MY child, reviewing math concepts his teacher had just introduced today: finding missing numbers.  Like I’m some expert on unknowns – kumbayah!  I cringe and shudder to even reminisce on the math requirements I trudged through – including 9th grade Algebra, and 11th grade Algebra II (God bless my teacher and her many hours of after-school help on my behalf).  I won’t even mention 10th grade Geometry…let’s have a moment of silence for the only “C” on my “I graduated as one of the top 10 students with “highest honors” transcript.

Remind me to tell you why my dad says we have the smartest dining room table in Virginia…I vaguely recall that it had something to do with me taking a “teleclass” for Statistics through community college one summer – thinking I wouldn’t need to actually watch the classes…until I ‘fessed up to my dad a week before the exam and he had to coach me through probability and Lord knows what else in no time flat.  Parenting – the job that keeps on giving…

Tonight, after realizing that my son didn’t understand the process for getting to the answer, I pulled out the blue and red checkers from the Connect Four game, 4 sheets of scrap paper (we used the front and back of 3 sheets), AND my calculator, to boot.  After I talk with the teacher tomorrow, I’m sure I’ll realize I did it the hard way, but we had to solve 10 – a = 4 without a negative number (a concept that hasn’t been introduced yet)…so you can probably imagine my BFQ (brain frazzlement quotient) after an 8-hour workday full of its own idiocy.  In the end, the boy made me proud – I don’t know if he was just pretending to “get it” so I’d let him go to bed at 10 p.m. (bless his li’l belly button – he’s usually crawling into bed by 8 p.m.), but he was able to show me his work after about the 12th problem we had to correct.  We’d stuck it out together.  Go, Team Cathcart – beat those mean ol’ numbers!  We RULE! 🙂

Nevertheless, God gives more grace to the humble…’cuz baby, I sure needed it tonight!  Lord, I thank You for being ever-present and ever near.  You are my Solution in the midst of every problem, puzzle, quandary, and conundrum.  Because You are more than able to equip me to handle whatever emergency arises, I can rest in You.  Selah.  Help me keep my heart ready to yield to Your every command. 

“And as he sat upon the mount of Olives, the disciples came unto him privately, saying, Tell us, when shall these things be? and what shall be the sign of thy coming, and of the end of the world?

And Jesus answered and said unto them, Take heed that no man deceive you.

For many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many.

And ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars: see that ye be not troubled: for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet.”

(Matthew 24:3-6)

 © Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

It Is Finished!

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“And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?”

(Matthew 27:46)

 “When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost.”

(John 19:30)

After weeks and months of agonizing, planning, preparing, and executing, The Great 2nd Grade Science Fair Project of 2011 has finally been handed in – hallelujah!  We concluded the experiment.  We finished the research paper BEFORE Spring Break (no minor feat to keep a 2nd grader focused in the house when they’d rather be outside playing).  We printed the hypothesis, cut out graphics, and pasted until our hearts were content.  Not only did I survive, but I emerged from the process stronger than I expected.  I’m glad it’s done (really glad – trust me!), but I have a greater appreciation for why God made me face my own science project angst and trepidation head-on.

See, I went into this with the mindset, “I’ve already earned my degree(s) – why, oh why must I go through this dreadful torture again?!?”  However, God showed me so many things through the course of working with my child on this project, including how very alike we are (in more ways than I care to admit), including:

  • Bright with natural aptitude = wanting to rush through the process to reach a conclusion (can’t see the forest for the trees)
  • Inclined to take the path of least resistance = being more focused on reaching the destination than enjoying the journey
  • Intense, perfectionist, self-critical = not being patient with the process, and sometimes getting unduly frustrated with the little things

I had plenty of opportunities for teachable moments – as teacher and as student.  For example, I overcame the urge to finish the report myself just so it would be done – because I’d be robbing my child of his learning process.  When one particular milestone progress report was due, we were solidly in the midst of the 21-day fast.  I was irate, aggravated, and hungry; what I wouldn’t have given for some junk food that Saturday!  Yet, God showed Himself strong and mighty, and HE ALONE sustained me through that episode without the crutch of emotionally eating chocolate or carbs! 

So here’s the bottom line praise report:  This week, my child was selected as one of the TOP THREE 2nd Graders to advance a project to the school’s Science Fair!  My initial goal had been simply to “get it done and turn it in.”  Sad to admit, but I wasn’t aiming for excellence – “pretty good” would’ve been fine with me.  But my child saw the guidelines for having a great project and he really wanted to win.  Since we serve a God of excellence (not mediocrity), I had to practice what I preach and give my best effort.  After all of my foot-dragging, complaining about how I didn’t want to do this because it’s just one more thing on my already full plate, yada yada yada…God showed that He was in the midst of the whole thing.  Like I didn’t have a sneaking suspicion from the time the assignment came home…

So it really was never about me at all. 🙂  It never is!  It’s always for God’s purposes.  And this time, I believe God wanted to see a snaggle-toothed smile from a boy who won a prize full of science gold – complete with modeling clay, slinky, microscope, and who knows what else is in that package.  He had his moment in the spotlight – being featured on the morning announcements, receiving congratulatory cheers from his classmates, standing on the stage beaming in front of peers and parents, and getting his picture taken by his little sister who was genuinely proud of him.

Did he win First Place in the School Science Fair?  Nope – not even Second or Third Place.  My hubby claims, “We was robbed!” and I’m rather inclined to agree with him…who me – biased?  Nah!  But in our eyes, he stood head and shoulders above the competition (including 3rd through 5th Graders).  He represented us well, and our whole family was there to support him for his hard work and to celebrate his accomplishments.  We have the certificates to prove it – and that big tri-fold board in the corner that I won’t soon forget.  I think my hubby wants to frame the entire board.  And I don’t blame him.  As Editor-in-Chief of www.PaperPolisher.com, I declare that working on this project and report with my child may have been some of my finest work yet. 

We must learn to see priorities from God’s perspective, and then commit to grow through the process He chooses for us.  My daughter will have to do science projects, too – won’t she? 🙂

“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.

For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil.”

(Ecclesiastes 12:13-14)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

In EVERY Thing Give Thanks

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Say WHAT?!?  Seriously, did my child just thank God for Daylight Saving Time during his prayer this morning?  Yeah, he did!  After I’m STRUGGLING to get back on an even keel, driving to work in the dark groggy, yawning for the first 3 hours of my day?  Uh-huh.  While I’m lamenting the loss of my precious hour of sleep, he’s embracing the beauty of change and relishing how the extra hour of sunlight directly translates into more time to play. 

Or maybe it’s not that deep.  Maybe he’s just a morning person and I’m not.  Whatever the case may be, it was a wake-up call for me – literally. 

I repent, Lord!  I am thankful even for Daylight Saving Time.  You have given me this day to be productive for You and share the light of Your love with someone who needs You.  Guide my steps and my words, I pray…

“In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”

(I Thessalonians 5:18)

 “I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work.”

(John 9:4)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Scary Slimy Carrots: Hearing the Voice of Godly Wisdom

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This is starting to be very repetitious; one would think I’d have this lesson down pat by now, right?  Me too.  But alas, as I gathered my lunch this morning, I righteously reached for some healthy veggies.  This NEW bag of baby carrots was unopened; there were 2 weeks remaining before the expiration date; they didn’t look ashen.  All is safe, n’est-ce pas?  Non!  Au contraire, mon ami!  I suppose the test continues to present itself until you pass it…(sigh). 

As I suspiciously sniffed (multiple times with one raised eyebrow) at the squirrelly texture of the foreign glaze/sludge covering my beloved snack, my daughter said, “I think you should throw that away, Mommy.”  Horror of horrors, if that chile don’t sound like her Daddy! Well, bless the Lord for godly wisdom in its many forms.  For some twisted reason – and against my better judgment, and KNOWING I wouldn’t be eating this forsaken fare – I decided to bring them on to work with me (“just in case” I got hungry and needed a healthy snack was my warped line of reasoning).  Translation: just in case I wanted my hubby to give me that “I told ya so” disapproving look while assuring me he had no problem taking me to get my stomach pumped for my imprudent decision.  But I TOTALLY agreed with her, “You’re right sweetie, those don’t look right at all!”  I couldn’t even bring myself to taste one “just to make sure.”  I couldn’t put my finger on it, but there was definitely something sinister about these innocent-looking veggies lurking in my crisper – skull and crossbones territory.

What is godly wisdom telling you to get rid of today because it’s just not good for you?  Don’t suffer the consequences of disobedience when you can make the right choice God is specifically pointing out with flashing neon lights, red arrows, loud bells and whistles, and “Bridge Out Ahead” signs.  Keep it simple – obey God’s voice…whomever you hear it through.

“…and a little child shall lead them.”

(Isaiah 11:6)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Science Fair Project: Midpoint Progress Report

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Well, we survived yet another phase in the ongoing saga of 2nd Grade Science Fair Projectdom.  Go on – I dare you to ask me why some materials float and why others don’t…

After 3 protracted hours of internet research, draft writing, and re-writing (yes, it could’ve been done in 1 hour if he hadn’t dragged it out), my son prayed during the grace over his hard-earned dinner, “Thank You Lord for helping me to finish my Science Fair Project Progress Report even though I waited until the last minute…”  I froze; he actually got the concept we were trying to drill into his precious little head!  He met the deadline, but we are working to teach him that you have to do a little bit each week so it’s not overwhelming and stressful at the last minute.

Perhaps most touching of all was when my son said at the conclusion of our Google research session, “I couldn’t have done it without you, Mom.”  You betcha, son…you betcha.  But being there for him is my job – and I’m committed to it, just like God is committed to taking care of us as His children.  He is a loving and gracious Father.  Have you thanked Him today for the grace and mercy He has shown in your life?

“Take, my brethren, the prophets, who have spoken in the name of the Lord, for an example of suffering affliction, and of patience.

Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy.”

(James 5:10-11)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Initial Progress Report: Operation Science Fair Project 2011

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God is a WONDER!  He kept me calm yesterday while I helped my son navigate the waters of selecting a Science Fair Project (SFP) idea, and he turned in his Initial Progress Report today (complete with testable question and materials list) – ON TIME!  If this sounds trivial, please reference my aforementioned aversion to Science Fair Projects.  This is nothing short of a miracle. 

We were so excited about getting started that we did the experiment part together (thanks to a Monday night homework sheet designed to jump start the SFP process) – I guided him to something not-too-intricate…for both of our sakes. 🙂  Through this learning opportunity, my young apprentice will learn “What materials float best on water.”  We selected a piece of wood, a hair pin, a penny, a cotton ball, a plastic ring, and I added a Cheerio at the end because I was DETERMINED to see something float.

I even backed up (from hovering over him and controlling the process like the helicopter mom that I am) to let him put each item in the water and take it out, too.  Ooooh…ahhhh!  The point of the SFP is for the student to enjoy the delight of discovery, right? Yada, yada, yada…my point is to get it over with, but I know God is working on my attitude with this set of circumstances.

As if that weren’t fantastic enough for one day, I also pulled my daughter’s second tooth and made my hubby’s requested pancake dinner…in spite of the fact that a fresh batch of whole wheat spaghetti with ground turkey was already lovingly cooked during my abundant free time this weekend – LOL!  Yes, God gave me His strength because I chose to obey Him and allow Him to change my heart, and I’m grateful.  Not because it was Valentine’s Day, but because of His unconditional love that keeps us from failing.  We’re halfway through the SFP – yippee!  Okay, maybe not halfway through, since there’s also a research paper to do (I will cross that bridge when I come to it), but we’ve made progress.  As my dad says, “How do you eat an elephant?  One bite at a time!”  Here’s to digesting our first bite…

Needless to say, SuperWoman has left the building…I am duly exhausted.  G’nite! 

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

 Nevertheless you have done well that you shared in my distress.”

(Philippians 4:13-14, NKJV) 

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Dread: The Thing That I GREATLY Feared Has Come Upon Me

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Just when I thought it was safe to come out…my son brought home The 2nd Grade Science Fair Project Guidelines.  Cue scary music… I hope my kindergartener doesn’t have to do one.  But I think it’s a school-wide project, so I’m waiting for that other shoe to drop any day now.  Ugh!

A little background:  throughout my tenure as a grade school student, Science Fair Projects (gulp) were my absolute bane.  Make no mistake, I could do them, it was just the process that I disdained immensely.  Why?  Because it challenged my time management abilities, caused me to plan and execute (I was great at the planning, but sloppy in my execution, which usually entailed waiting until the last minute), and made me wonder, “What exactly does this have to do with real life anyway???  I’m a literary person, so why do I have to deal with this science stuff?”

Fear and trembling ensued as I looked at The Timeline page (that was nice of ‘em to spell it out).  Remain calm, I coached myself.

  • Concept and project materials write-up due February 15 – that’s next week.
  • Progress Update due March 4 – that’s in a few weeks.
  • Final Project due April 26 – arrrrgggghhh!  On top of everything else going on, now I have a SCIENCE PROJECT to facilitate?!?

I lost it – flipped into panic mode and punched the red emergency button.

I’ve asked my wonderful hubby for support in making sure my son’s project gets done well…since he watches the Science Channel for fun (go figure!), he should be a great resource.  I let him know my angst, trepidation, and bumpy history with these things, but I know I can’t get around involvement in this endeavor.  Since my hubby thrives on challenges, he gets just as much of a thrill out of seeing other people confront their challenges – whether they want to or not.  So I’m gonna have to face this.  And not just deal with it, but conquer it. I’m too old to keep running away.

Amazing…so I’m gonna have to quote and live II Timothy 1:7…(flashback to the 80s) just like when my mom would tell me when I had my own Science Fair Project assignments, “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”  Make no mistake, saints: there’s no escaping a lesson God wants you to learn.  Trust me, I’ve tried.  Yet, here I am 20+ years later staring at Science Fair Project Guidelines – again.  And I thought I’d “graduated” when I got through “The Great Play-Doh Turtle-in-a-Shoebox Animal Habitat Project” of October 2009 with my mind intact.  What teacher gives kindergartners projects anyway???  Apparently, the teachers of my children.  Stay tuned…there’s definitely more to come…and I’ll be growing right along with my children.  Sigh!

“For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.”

(Job 3:25)

 “Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me, and horror hath overwhelmed me.”

(Psalm 55:5)

 © Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Embracing Maturity

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This July was full of blogworthy events, but you didn’t hear from me because I’ve been honeymooning with my spouse!  While the little ones visited their grandparents in another state for an entire month, hubby and I took that opportunity to focus on each other (without reminding children to take their baths, clean their rooms, finish their veggies, or stop giggling and go to bed NOW!) and build our marriage.  Though we’ll enthusiastically celebrate our 10-year anniversary in a few months, it’s important for couples to regularly build in time for reflection, restoration, and rejuvenation.  You wouldn’t believe how routine can turn into a rut that wears you down!

On the eve of my children returning from their away-from-home adventures, I anticipate that they’ve grown a lot and learned many new things they’ll be eager to share.  I’m somewhat of a “helicopter parent,” so it took maturity on my part to let them go.  However, our job as parents is to train our children and prepare them to be functional and successful without us – that’s what a healthy growing up experience is all about.  My youngest child was homesick the first week, but I knew that exposure to a different environment would help her to be well-rounded (especially since she’ll transition from daycare to kindergarten over the next three weeks).  We don’t always get to choose our surroundings, so it’s good to learn how to adapt.   I know she has matured.  My oldest child seems to thrive when meeting new people, so I think he probably enjoyed not having me hovering over him; I’m learning to give him room to spread his wings (while still setting boundaries and parameters, of course!). 

They’re excited about seeing their redecorated room, and I look forward to seeing their beach-tanned faces and getting big hugs!  We all made it through summer vacation, and we have maturity to show for it.  We’ll give each other grace as we transition back into working as a unit – and with patience, we’ll get acclimated to the changes we’ve each undergone in one month.  We’re supposed to grow, develop, and mature – God didn’t call us to stay the same…in the spiritual realm or in the natural realm.  So don’t fight the situations that are causing you to stretch beyond your comfort zone!  God is maturing you for His purposes.  🙂

“But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.”

(II Peter 3:18)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Growth in the Blink of an Eye

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It seems like just yesterday we were watching the mama robin build her nest in a rafter on our front porch.  We marveled at the beautiful little blue eggs, being careful not to disturb “the babies.”  Then they hatched – featherless and funny-looking, big heads and beaks protruding from the nest, begging to be fed whatever their mama brought back for them.  Before I knew it, one was hopping on the walkway.  Though it couldn’t fly, it was out of the nest.  Amazing – it happened so quick!  We mused among ourselves whether it had fallen out or if the mama bird had pushed it out.  Whatever the case, that tiny nest was no place for that bird to make its permanent abode. 

Over the course of a few days or a couple of weeks, all of the birds were out of the nest, and we could see them testing out their wings and swooping through the yard, sometimes in a wobbly pattern.  But they were trying.  Why?  Because they were created to fly, not to sit in a nest they’d outgrown.  Sure, it’s safe and comfortable to stay in the place where you’re nurtured, fed on schedule, and taken care of from morning until night.  However, over time, you are required to take what you’ve learned and apply it.  That process, my friend, is called growth.  I recently had a real-life experience to underscore that lesson. 

When picking up my daughter from daycare one afternoon, I called myself leaving the car door open so she could get in on her own – imagine, a child of mine with an independent streak? Tee hee hee!  I tend to be a “helicopter parent” (hovering over my children – LOL!) and I’m trying to relinquish my tight hold on some of the more mundane tasks of the day.  Kudos, right?  Well, I turned to say something to the daycare provider, and in literally 2 seconds, I heard my daughter cry out in pain.  When I turned my head, she was lying in a fetal position near the rear tire on the driver’s side of the car.  To this day, I don’t know HOW that child fell; her shoes were tied, I don’t think her pants were too long, and I don’t think the earth’s gravitational pull shifted suddenly.  But whatever the reason, she fell and ended up with bloody boo-boos on her elbow and knee (through the clothing…did she lose her balance? I’m still puzzled).  They weren’t life-altering emergencies, but you don’t know how I wished I’d held her hand and walked her to the car, watching her like a hawk (like I usually do)!  Nonetheless, though I want to protect her 24/7, it’s ridiculous to think I can tote a 5 year-old from daycare door to car door every blessed day God gives.  At some point, she’s got to learn to walk on her own.  When she gets hurt, I’m there with the peroxide, antibiotic ointment, band-aids, hugs and kisses.  But to obsess about preventing every accident or growing pain isn’t realistic for me as a parent.  If I’ve taught her well, she’ll apply my lessons and flourish.

Isn’t that how God is with us?  He watches over us, fiercely protecting us from hurt, harm, and danger.  He gives us instructions on moving ahead, going beyond what we know and moving into areas where we have to exercise our faith in HIM knowing the outcome.  We don’t have to figure it out; He’s mapped out our course for us.  When we obey, we’re covered by Him.  What could be better?  We’re not on our own in this day-to-day walk.  When we trip and fall, He’s there to correct us and set us back on the right track.  Praise God!

“He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.  I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.”

(Psalm 91:1-2)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart