Abiding Under the Shadow of the Almighty

I’m grateful that the shadow of the Almighty is bigger than mine!

Not a bird in sight during my impromptu Saturday afternoon walk…

Yet, when I heard a flurry of chirps, tweets, squawks – and other sounds too challenging to describe with words – I knew there were many birds nestled just beyond the leaves. Though I couldn’t see them tucked into the covert of the bushes, their cacophony of sounds evidenced a vibrant winged community hidden from my sight.

In times like these, may we abide under the shadow of the Almighty and experience firsthand His covering from the imminent threats, dangers, evils, and perils that are near. May God’s hedge of protection continue to surround His children as we humble ourselves and pray…

“1 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.
3 Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence.
4 He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.”
(Psalm 91:1-4)

Functioning, but Dysfunctional

Posted by kayrencathcart

dysfunctional – not operating normally or properly

A recent bout with black shower mold has become quite the personal vexation…but to the point that I’d finally do something about it? I cleaned it out the last 2 times – and here we are again, in the same grout lines, similar creeping (& creepy) pattern. Ironic that I’ve been cleansing myself in a less-than-ideally-clean setting…however, I digress. I reasoned that if the shower head hadn’t started leaking (last year), or if the leaky shower head had been replaced (which it was this week…and it still leaks), then the mold wouldn’t have a warm, moist environment in which to multiply its inherent ugliness.

Yet, it is futile to consider prevention at the point when remediation is required. So I have a decision to make: continue to angst over the slimy ickiness I’m semi-avoiding with shower shoes (for longer than I care to admit tolerating with utter disdain), or bust out the rubber gloves and cleanser (once more) and address the root cause that has become the bane of my daily hygiene routine.

Isn’t that how God addresses our sin when we’re functioning, but dysfunctional? He sees that repetitious things pop up in our lives once again, and still lovingly washes away the offenses with His efficacious Blood (that we can’t seem to get rid of on our own) until we are white as snow. I guess it’s time for me to bust some serious suds in that shower stall…once again.

Update: Fed up with the foolishness, I finally did clean it a week after severe aggravation became unbearable. While I breathed a sigh of relief for the upgrade, it looks like it still needs another round of scouring. It just goes to show that cleansing (both in the natural and in the spirit) is an ongoing process.

“16 Wash you, make you clean;
put away the evil of your doings from before mine eyes;
cease to do evil;

18 Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD:
though your sins be as scarlet,
they shall be as white as snow;
though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.”
(Isaiah 1:16, 18)

Cleansing Cometh: More Transition…Really?!

Posted by kayrencathcart

Trust me – this IS progress; the drawer WAS fully stuffed yesterday…

So a co-worker called me the offensive “h-word” today…no, not heifer…hoarder. I smarted as if I’d been stung by a bee, wondering where that zinger came from. I thought I had made progress. And I had, until it became incumbent upon me to prepare for the inevitable office move of less than 50 feet to the other side of the SAME floor (side glance – now what executive thought this was an efficiency-saver?! Riiight…). With 2 days to go, I was definitely under pressure and behind the power curve.

Honestly, I can understand my co-worker’s point (I know she meant no harm, and it really was ridiculous the amount of stuff I’d collected while sitting there since 2014 – and of course I brought a few things from previous roles, too. Or maybe more than a few, it seems…). I also understood the moving coordinators who stopped by ever-so-often to gently inquire if I was gonna make the “be off the floor ‘cuz the movers are here” Friday at 2pm deadline. As the pressure mounted, I felt myself getting more overwhelmed. (I’d already had a mini-meltdown when stripping the cube walls earlier in the week – everything looked so stark, empty, and blank. Then I saw my children’s baby pictures and reflected on my youngest now heading to high school and the tears started leaking out of my eyelids. It wasn’t a pretty moment. Thankfully, it passed quickly).

As I toted papers to the shred bin, another co-worker peeked her head out from behind her computer monitor – a new employee who I noticed like to write, just like me. However, I discovered her hidden superpower today: organizing. She watched me swoosh past her desk several times frantically ferrying the many small to mid-sized boxes I’d accumulated over years of administrative support “just in case someone needs ‘em, I’ve got ‘em!” Finally she asked me, “Are you OK?” And I sheepishly whispered that I’d just been called a hoarder and I needed to speed up my purging if I was gonna make the packing deadline without the movers tossing any remaining unpacked items – of which I had many lingering.

With a single sentence, she tossed me a lifesaver of hope, “When you get to your new cube, we’re going to get you off to a fresh, new, organized workspace.” Wow – someone who barely knew me was offering to help me (because it was obvious that I desperately needed assistance since my plan to keep accumulating and stuffing had finally reached the breaking point – no pun intended…I think my file drawers were at capacity).

So today’s lesson is this: At some point, you’ve gotta take some stuff out to maintain a healthy balance; you can’t keep shovin’ stuff in. This goes for emotions, relationships, food, whatever…

Let the cleansing continue.

My desk & shelves haven’t been this empty since I moved into this cube in 2014…I’m learning to travel lighter – that’s for sure!

“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”
(Psalm 51:10)

Living the Sumptuous Life: Smoked Turkey Wing Facial

Posted by kayrencathcart

My hubby was simmering cabbage with smoked turkey wings for a luscious meal complement this past weekend. I hastily walked by as the steam escaped beneath the big pot’s lid. Then I backtracked – drawn in by the promise of the yummy meal unfolding before my very eyes, and I captured a modicum of mommy bliss – right in my kitchen.

Inhaling the velvety aroma, I allowed my skin to be moistened by the warm mist. I lingered as the kitchen warmth engulfed me. I smiled and mused on not needing a spa appointment when boiling water is so readily available. And at that moment, all was well with the world.

In the midst of everything you have going on, what fleeting moment have you chosen to capture and savor this week? Please feel free to share in the comments…and let me know what dish YOU try for your next impromptu home facial! LOL 🙂 #CarpeDiem #CarpeSmokedTurkeyWingFacial

“O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.”
(Psalm 34:8)

Dusk/Nightfall: Time to Replenish

Posted by kayrencathcart

You know morning comes again after the darkness. And you still yourself and endure just a little while longer. The moon and the ever-changing sky palette were a perfect recap to this full week. Taking a moment to savor my progression was a welcome respite.

I took time for my cardio activity, not being concerned about anyone else for that 30 minutes. It wasn’t selfish; it was restorative. As an adult, I’ve come to realize that while my matriarchal role models could nurture the ever-living daylights out of someone (or everyone in their sphere of influence), they didn’t generally model self-care effectively – or at all. So I’m learning (of a necessity) how to do this now. Acknowledging that taking care of others doesn’t have to occur at the expense of neglecting myself. Balance is possible – when you make it an intentionally incorporated part of the process – it doesn’t happen on its own!

Sometimes my own self-care is the best of intentions with weak (or no) execution. Sometimes it’s trial-and-error. But sometimes – like today – I nail it! So I celebrate my success without guilt. Because what good am I to others if there’s nothing left to give? Exactly…

How can you intentionally celebrate your own prelude to joy this week? Give it some thought. Feel free to share in the comments if you’d like.

“5 For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
10 Hear, O Lord, and have mercy upon me: Lord, be thou my helper.
11 Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness;
12 To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.”
(Psalm 30:5, 10-12 KJV)

Sterile/Sterilized Relationships

Posted by kayrencathcart

Tough to admit to myself – let alone to others, but I realize after reading Matthew 18:15 that I’ve pretty much had an emotional condom at the ready in most of my friendships – just in case things got heated! Not wanting to be fully transparent and unable to yield to complete intimacy for fear of being unliked, unaccepted, misunderstood, or just downright rejected. Trying to protect myself from as-yet-unhappened hurts (but bracing for their potential occurrence). That’s why I wore a mask and tried to only show the “good parts” of me. But that’s unreal. Not human. Did that make me an alien? LOL. No, but it did contribute to the existence of a very tormented, agonizing human.

Trying to broker all these moving pieces in multiple dynamic relationships was like spinning a bunch of plates. And when the exhaustion of trying to manage the not-meant-to-be-managed process caused me to fray, I went kaput and the gears stopped turning and the wheels ground to a screeching halt. The plates began to crash as I no longer had the energy to meticulously attend to each one wobbling out of control – just beyond my grasp and inability to “fix it.” And I was left to examine myself, and the trail of fragmented relationships strewn on the path behind me.

Then a funny thing happened: God caused me to start revisiting those relationships. Not to reopen old wounds, but for the purpose of closure. So I could see that – even in the midst of my own imperfections, shortcomings, and mistakes (of which there are many) – He was able to bring healing to my broken places if I would but allow Him access. Vulnerable place? You betcha. But it’s where I find myself. And when you come to understand that being on the Potter’s wheel is exactly where He wants you so He can fashion an even more exquisite vessel out of the disparate pieces of your life, a certain level of peace comes. I remain in progress and in process…

“Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.”
(Matthew 18:15)

Applying Emotional Baggage Depilatory

Posted by kayrencathcart

depilatory – a cream or lotion for removing unwanted hair

Removing excess emotional baggage can be cumbersome.
However, the process can be abbreviated with some well-applied wisdom…kinda like hair removal.
Sorta. Like if you squint one eye and look real hard…

This week, I made significant personal process in purging out some old mindsets, thought patterns, and behaviors. This advancement was accompanied by intentionally doing some new and unfamiliar activities. For instance, take my experience today of using a cream hair removal product for the first time in my life. A friend told me she recently used some on her elementary school-aged daughter’s underarms. I’d shaved my underarms since high school (thanks, show choir costumes), but I stopped a few years ago because of discomfort from bumps due to ingrown hairs (no doubt, my cheap, dull razors contributed to this quandary). Since I was recently blessed with some new sleeveless dresses by friends cleaning out their closets, I figured I’d test out the product, and picked up a bottle for less than $5 this afternoon.

I carefully read the directions before showering: Apply a thick layer of cream for 3 minutes. Do not leave on for longer than 10 minutes. Not for use on face. Wipe off gently with a rag and rinse. Do not rub. Got it.

While waiting for the product to work, I planned to roll my hair. But first, I washed my face, and then I determined to make sure to wash my hands thoroughly after applying the product to my underarms. I got downright tickled thinking, “Hmmm, if there’s product residue on my hands, I certainly don’t want to see a patch of hair on my head sliding off before Sunday Service!” So I washed my hands a second time just to be on the safe side (and avoid a replay of the Hot Pepper Hands incident). An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!

I proceeded to roll my hair without incident. Once I got into the shower, I followed the gentle wiping directions, and voilà, off slid my underarm hair! My underarms looked good upon closer inspection with my magnifying mirror. Only after the process did I learn of what creates the hair removal miracle: a strong and alkaline-based product is placed on the unwanted hair, and it processes hair into a jelly-like substance. I didn’t expect to have a science experiment in my shower, but I’m glad it was uneventful.

After a few online searches, I learned that epilation removes the entire hair at the follicle level (from the root), while hair is removed only to the surface with depilation, Which means, I’m gonna have to revisit any hair that grows back – or emotional baggage that lingers. I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. For the time being, I’m enjoying being a few clumps of hair lighter as I lay out my sleeveless dress for tomorrow – I can raise my arms without a second thought…no small forests here; the underbrush has been removed! Ironic that God had me try this new hair removal product as I was clearing out my emotional cache? No way! He is most strategic and intentional…by design. He knew this was gonna happen wayyyyy before I did (the hair removal AND the emotional baggage clean-up). #Grateful

“18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.
19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.”
(Matthew 7:18-19)

Rest for The Weary: Stop Living on Overdrawn Credit

Posted by kayrencathcart

When do you finally realize you’ve been living beyond your means? When you’ve expended more emotional capital then you’ve amassed? When you’ve “tapped out” and have very little, if anything left to give if you don’t replenish your own storehouse?

Come to the wells of salvation and drink deeply…be saved from yourself – your own devices, plans, plots, desires, entrapments, entanglements…find rest for your soul in the Master’s presence.

You remember that place of refreshing – it’s still there. Waiting for your return – as a permanent resident in the presence of the Lord instead of intermittent visitor.

“Thou wilt shew me the path of life:
in thy presence is fulness of joy;
at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.”
(Psalm 16:11, KJV)

“28 Come to Me, all who are weary and heavily burdened [by religious rituals that provide no peace], and I will give you rest [refreshing your souls with salvation].
29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me [following Me as My disciple], for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest (renewal, blessed quiet) for your souls.
30 For My yoke is easy [to bear] and My burden is light.”
(Matthew 11:28-30, AMP)

My Walk: Steps to Greater Commitment

Posted by kayrencathcart

I’m walking in the Spirit…

Saturday morning, I walked. Outside. Alone. Spontaneously. Unscheduled. It was exactly what I needed to clear my head and take in God’s creation all around me.

As I passed a neighborhood pool, the sound of gently lapping waves reminded me that He leads me beside still waters and restores my soul (Psalm 23). I saw a beautiful butterfly lilting carelessly on the wind. I saw a decomposing bunny carcass attended by buzzing flies. I also saw a live bunny sitting oh-so-still next to a neighbor’s house and tried to silently warn him of the dangers lurking in the area.

This was out of my regular routine of taking group fitness classes at the gym – but hey, we’re in a new dispensation, so I should be doing new things, right? Between my walk and choir rehearsals, I racked up over 20,000 steps on my Fitbit – which I never thought I’d see in one day, so I was pretty proud of myself. I enjoyed the walk so much that I’m looking forward to taking another one this week. May we daily renew our commitment to walk in close fellowship with our Creator.

“16 this I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfill the list of the flesh.
25 If we live I the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.”
(Galatians 5:16, 25)

Backing Up Into the Mercy of God

Posted by kayrencathcart

The names have been changed to protect the innocent who may or may not have unintentionally impacted their own garage doors…

As I left the house to pick up my children from their science summer camp, I must’ve gotten my sequence – or at least my timing – out of whack. It kinda changed the course of my afternoon into the epic saga chronicled below. Pop some popcorn – don’t say I didn’t warn ya…

Backstory (because with me, there’s always a backstory, right?): This morning, my valiant husband saw something in the yard that didn’t belong and promptly disposed of it. Since he knows how much I absolutely abhor and detest creepy-crawlies, he was quite inconspicuous about addressing this as part of his “on my way to work” routine. But as I passed the window, I saw something he’d speared hanging from the rake and was taking to the big garbage can. I cringed, grateful that something hadn’t gotten me the last time I went to pick fresh garden basil – eek! I was safe, thanks to my knight in shining armor wielding a yard implement.

With this backstory in mind as I cautiously scanned for signs of an unwanted something anywhere near my garage, I got in the car to go get my children and was ready to shut the door quickly to batten down the hatches and fortify my castle. The radio was on with a Bible story being read, I pressed the garage door opener button, put the car in Reverse, and <clunk!>…wait a minute, that’s NOT a sound I’m used to hearing. I put the car in Drive as I realized the garage door hadn’t finished going up before I accelerated in Reverse. Ugh! Not good.

I tentatively pushed the garage door button and the door made its way back up. Good. I backed up wayyyy more slowly; once out of the garage, I gently pushed the button and saw the door going down…until it was crooked…and stopped moving. Not good. Halfway closed, halfway open…and my house potentially susceptible to something crawling in. Oh noooooo! I’d made up my mind to tell my hubby face-to-face about the slight paint scrape on the vehicle’s point of contact (merely cosmetic, I wistfully assessed). But the mangled, defeated-looking metal door (with a slight vehicle-shaped bulge along the bottom edge) hanging off-kilter necessitated immediate self-disclosure.

With slight apprehension, I dialed my hubby as I drove to pick up the children – on time, mind you – and recounted an abbreviated version of my past 5 minutes. He said he was leaving work immediately to take care of this at home. I guess the inquiry in my sweetest voice, “Who would you call if you needed help getting a garage door to close?” didn’t garner his vote of confidence in my ability to satisfactorily resolve the situation on my own. I can’t say I blamed him.

By the time I returned home with the children (safely and without further incident, thankfully), he was already parked in the driveway and surveying my unsolicited demolition; he must’ve flown from his job. But he looked at me squarely and said, “That’s why we have insurance. We can get another garage door or vehicle, but we can’t replace you.” Talk about being overwhelmed by the manifested love and mercy of God! My hubby’s genuinely compassionate response turned my sheepishness to relief. (Sidebar: Who needs Hallmark Channel fantasies with real life moments like that?! LOL).

After a few RFPs summoning the first garage door professional who could be on-site, the garage door was down about 4 hours later (with only a slight rift at the bottom, hopefully impenetrable by something), its replacement to be installed early next week.

The story could’ve turned out so differently. So I end this day on a note of sincere gratitude to my Creator and Protector (who saw fit to give me a godly husband to watch out for me – ‘cuz obviously I need oversight!), and a resolution to slow down even more. I invite you to take a moment to reflect on God’s mercy in your own life. You don’t even have to back into your own garage door to be reflective! 🙂

“19 Remembering mine affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the gall.
20 My soul hath them still in remembrance, and is humbled in me.
21 This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope.
22 It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
23 They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.
24 The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.
25 The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him.
26 It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord.”
(Lamentations 3:19-26)

Kayren Cathcart's Blog

Observations on daily life and inspiration for spiritual growth…

health

Abiding Under the Shadow of the Almighty

Functioning, but Dysfunctional

Cleansing Cometh: More Transition…Really?!

Living the Sumptuous Life: Smoked Turkey Wing Facial

Dusk/Nightfall: Time to Replenish

Sterile/Sterilized Relationships

Applying Emotional Baggage Depilatory

Rest for The Weary: Stop Living on Overdrawn Credit

My Walk: Steps to Greater Commitment

Backing Up Into the Mercy of God