Shopping for the Apocalypse…and other ridiculously skewed notions

Well, I finally cleaned out my purse because it had become increasingly and unbearably heavier over the past few weeks.  In a rare moment of “clutter enlightenment,” I realized some of the stuff I’d amassed just needed to be discarded, including:

  • A clump of tissues for those “mommy-preparedness moments” that had sunken to the bottom, were disintegrating, and were releasing bits of dustlets (is “dustlets” a word? I dunno, but the paper fibers are floating everywhere and it’s pretty annoying)
  • Business cards for a business I’m no longer in
  • Five assorted shades lip glosses and lipsticks – like, how many lips do I have?
  • Multiple pens in various colors – I will not give on this one – hey, I’m a writer!

What really caught my eye was the 4-week collection of grocery lists…and pantry inventories taken before weekly grocery trips…and accompanying grocery receipts.  Seriously – am I planning to conduct a quantitative analysis based on and extracted from my weekly shopping data?  NO.  So why can’t I just trash ‘em???  Oh wow – did I actually just find this online resource?  Not sure if I can do this, but I might have to give it a try…is that a key indicator if I had a sudden urge to PRINT this advice and post it in my cube???  Hmmm, yes, that’s addressed in #3…Lord, have mercy…

Praise report:  I am now able to stick to the weekly grocery budget given to me by my hubby.  That’s a major accomplishment for someone who didn’t connect going over the allotted amount by an extra $5 or $10 (or whatever) with taking available funds away from another bill in the monthly budget.  Did I subconsciously think there was a money tree growing somewhere on my property??? No, but my compulsive tendencies were fueled by the lure of “SALE – this week only!” and coupons for items I wasn’t even planning to buy.  With prayer, I’m learning to stay focused and get no more than what my family needs for this week.  But it’s tough when you can “justify” getting it “just in case” – especially if it’s on sale…

I repented as I sheepishly admitted that stockpiling for “just in case” and gluttony were closely tied to my “preparations” of having “enough” in the house.  No problem with being prepared…but when it’s driven by anxiety, you have to check your motives.  I did.

“He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the hidden manna, and will give him a white stone, and in the stone a new name written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth it.”

(Revelation 2:17)

 “And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.”

(Revelation 6:8)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Science Fair Project: Midpoint Progress Report

Well, we survived yet another phase in the ongoing saga of 2nd Grade Science Fair Projectdom.  Go on – I dare you to ask me why some materials float and why others don’t…

After 3 protracted hours of internet research, draft writing, and re-writing (yes, it could’ve been done in 1 hour if he hadn’t dragged it out), my son prayed during the grace over his hard-earned dinner, “Thank You Lord for helping me to finish my Science Fair Project Progress Report even though I waited until the last minute…”  I froze; he actually got the concept we were trying to drill into his precious little head!  He met the deadline, but we are working to teach him that you have to do a little bit each week so it’s not overwhelming and stressful at the last minute.

Perhaps most touching of all was when my son said at the conclusion of our Google research session, “I couldn’t have done it without you, Mom.”  You betcha, son…you betcha.  But being there for him is my job – and I’m committed to it, just like God is committed to taking care of us as His children.  He is a loving and gracious Father.  Have you thanked Him today for the grace and mercy He has shown in your life?

“Take, my brethren, the prophets, who have spoken in the name of the Lord, for an example of suffering affliction, and of patience.

Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy.”

(James 5:10-11)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

French Press for Dummies

With all of the “how-to” books written on a remedial level to help the simplicity-challenged, I propose a new title:  French Press for Dummies.  Why, you may ask?  It’s a funny thing…

I’m not a big coffee person (I prefer cocoa), but since my hubby is, I make his coffee in the morning so he doesn’t have to dish out budget-zapping change to SBUX or McD’s.  Being the deal-seeker that I am, I got a big ol’ vat o’ Folgers when it was on sale at the grocery store…only to realize (too late – at home) that it was on sale for cheap because it wasn’t instant coffee.  And I’d broken the pot to the coffeemaker many moons ago.  So what was I to do with all of this coffee and no machine?

It took a friend with a law degree to unpuzzle me.  She recommended a French press for getting some use (and tastier coffee) out of those grounds.  I’d never heard of one, but she told me it was really simple to use.  I like simple (a LOT), so I gave her money…and within a week, she’d found one for under $5 – great, right?  Wrong – I was befuddled and my hubby was caffeine-deprived for several days.  My quandary?  The Folgers directions gave measurements for preparing a 6 oz. cup of coffee.  The French press gizmo directions gave measurements for “1 scoop per 4 oz. of water.”  Powerless to reconcile the ratio of water to coffee grounds, I was stuck.  As in “fork in the road, don’t know which way I’m going, and my written directions just flew outta the sunroof – so I’ll just pull over on the side of the road until I figure out what to do next” stuck.  (Yes, that really happened to me – I’m directionally-challenged, too…but that’s another story for another day).  With my inability to convert simple math for a cup o’ joe, you wouldn’t think I work at a bank, right?  Or these days, maybe you would.  Nevertheless…

When she came to visit me about 2 weeks after she’d givien me the French press, I sheepishly admitted my ignorance and confessed that I’d been terrified to do it wrong, so I hadn’t made any coffee with it yet.  She patiently illuminated the process (by telling me to go with the Folgers directions), and I was happy to finally make 8 oz. of coffee quite easily – whew!  Yay – problem solved!  And it was tastier than instant coffee, so it was worth the wait.

Why do we get frustrated when we don’t know what’s coming next?  Do we have a problem asking for help?  Will it really hurt to admit that we don’t know everything?  We are “in the press” because God is always at work in His children. Let us continue to allow Him to press us for His glory.

p.s.  A special shout out to my “smarty pants” sistahfriend in the blogosphere – the highest-paid corporate barista out there!  No shame if they ask you to get their coffee even though you have a graduate degree.  Just laugh all the way to the bank while you provide service with a smile.  If they wanna pay multiple thousands of dollars a year for someone to get their coffee, who are we to question?!

“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”

(Philippians 3:13-14)

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Initial Progress Report: Operation Science Fair Project 2011

God is a WONDER!  He kept me calm yesterday while I helped my son navigate the waters of selecting a Science Fair Project (SFP) idea, and he turned in his Initial Progress Report today (complete with testable question and materials list) – ON TIME!  If this sounds trivial, please reference my aforementioned aversion to Science Fair Projects.  This is nothing short of a miracle. 

We were so excited about getting started that we did the experiment part together (thanks to a Monday night homework sheet designed to jump start the SFP process) – I guided him to something not-too-intricate…for both of our sakes. 🙂  Through this learning opportunity, my young apprentice will learn “What materials float best on water.”  We selected a piece of wood, a hair pin, a penny, a cotton ball, a plastic ring, and I added a Cheerio at the end because I was DETERMINED to see something float.

I even backed up (from hovering over him and controlling the process like the helicopter mom that I am) to let him put each item in the water and take it out, too.  Ooooh…ahhhh!  The point of the SFP is for the student to enjoy the delight of discovery, right? Yada, yada, yada…my point is to get it over with, but I know God is working on my attitude with this set of circumstances.

As if that weren’t fantastic enough for one day, I also pulled my daughter’s second tooth and made my hubby’s requested pancake dinner…in spite of the fact that a fresh batch of whole wheat spaghetti with ground turkey was already lovingly cooked during my abundant free time this weekend – LOL!  Yes, God gave me His strength because I chose to obey Him and allow Him to change my heart, and I’m grateful.  Not because it was Valentine’s Day, but because of His unconditional love that keeps us from failing.  We’re halfway through the SFP – yippee!  Okay, maybe not halfway through, since there’s also a research paper to do (I will cross that bridge when I come to it), but we’ve made progress.  As my dad says, “How do you eat an elephant?  One bite at a time!”  Here’s to digesting our first bite…

Needless to say, SuperWoman has left the building…I am duly exhausted.  G’nite! 

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

 Nevertheless you have done well that you shared in my distress.”

(Philippians 4:13-14, NKJV) 

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Dread: The Thing That I GREATLY Feared Has Come Upon Me

Just when I thought it was safe to come out…my son brought home The 2nd Grade Science Fair Project Guidelines.  Cue scary music… I hope my kindergartener doesn’t have to do one.  But I think it’s a school-wide project, so I’m waiting for that other shoe to drop any day now.  Ugh!

A little background:  throughout my tenure as a grade school student, Science Fair Projects (gulp) were my absolute bane.  Make no mistake, I could do them, it was just the process that I disdained immensely.  Why?  Because it challenged my time management abilities, caused me to plan and execute (I was great at the planning, but sloppy in my execution, which usually entailed waiting until the last minute), and made me wonder, “What exactly does this have to do with real life anyway???  I’m a literary person, so why do I have to deal with this science stuff?”

Fear and trembling ensued as I looked at The Timeline page (that was nice of ‘em to spell it out).  Remain calm, I coached myself.

  • Concept and project materials write-up due February 15 – that’s next week.
  • Progress Update due March 4 – that’s in a few weeks.
  • Final Project due April 26 – arrrrgggghhh!  On top of everything else going on, now I have a SCIENCE PROJECT to facilitate?!?

I lost it – flipped into panic mode and punched the red emergency button.

I’ve asked my wonderful hubby for support in making sure my son’s project gets done well…since he watches the Science Channel for fun (go figure!), he should be a great resource.  I let him know my angst, trepidation, and bumpy history with these things, but I know I can’t get around involvement in this endeavor.  Since my hubby thrives on challenges, he gets just as much of a thrill out of seeing other people confront their challenges – whether they want to or not.  So I’m gonna have to face this.  And not just deal with it, but conquer it. I’m too old to keep running away.

Amazing…so I’m gonna have to quote and live II Timothy 1:7…(flashback to the 80s) just like when my mom would tell me when I had my own Science Fair Project assignments, “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”  Make no mistake, saints: there’s no escaping a lesson God wants you to learn.  Trust me, I’ve tried.  Yet, here I am 20+ years later staring at Science Fair Project Guidelines – again.  And I thought I’d “graduated” when I got through “The Great Play-Doh Turtle-in-a-Shoebox Animal Habitat Project” of October 2009 with my mind intact.  What teacher gives kindergartners projects anyway???  Apparently, the teachers of my children.  Stay tuned…there’s definitely more to come…and I’ll be growing right along with my children.  Sigh!

“For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.”

(Job 3:25)

 “Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me, and horror hath overwhelmed me.”

(Psalm 55:5)

 © Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The Veggie Sausage Revelation: Are You Hot, Cold, or Lukewarm?

So what exactly does me choosing veggie sausage have to do with obedience?  Nothing and absolutely everything – all at the same time.  I say “nothing” because, in the big scheme of the cosmos, choosing veggie sausage isn’t really that big of a deal (turkey sausage ain’t half bad, right?).  Yet, I say “absolutely everything” because, in light of eternity, veggie sausage represents (for me) obedience to God and the process it takes to do so.  Because it’s not a one-time decision; it’s the start of a commitment to continue doing the right thing (lower cholesterol), the healthier thing (less fat), the better thing (even if other family members choose meat)…the obedient thing.  That’s the bottom line.  Indulge me for a moment as I elaborate… 

In the past, I’d be presented with two choices (obedience to God vs. what I wanted to do) – and they were usually diametrically opposed.  Instead of automatically relying on the Holy Spirit to guide me into all truth, sometimes, I’d make my decision by mentally flipping a coin; other times, I’d try to do the right thing; and occasionally, I’d create a hybrid blend of the two (read: hot mess – actually, lukewarm and spewed out).  Needless to say, the hybrid doesn’t yield consistent results because it takes some properties from both sides of the fence…and we know what happens when we straddle the fence, now don’t we?!

So what’s your veggie sausage?  That decision you’ve been skipping over and postponing for far too long?  The linchpin that will lead to you getting back on track in other areas of your life?  Yeah, that one.  God wants you to make the decision as He leads, and walk in obedience to His will.  Can veggie sausage do all that?  Yes, my friend, all that and more…

“I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.

So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.”

(Revelation 3:15-16) 

© Copyright 2011 by Kayren J. Cathcart

A Bird’s Eye View of My Environment

On what is celebrated as Earth Day, I suppose it’s fitting to reflect on the nature preserve that my yard has become…duck eggs and robins’ nests and ‘possums – oh my!  But bugs and inchworms, too, Lord?

Just when I thought Spring wouldn’t bring anything else into my yard, I have been proven wrong – over and over and over again!  Apparently, the animal world has telegraphed something about my hubby being the Jack Hanna of Charlotte, because we’ve had a robin building a nest atop the corner post of our front porch for the past couple of weeks.  It was comical and almost ironic to arrive home from vacation to see the nest-building material strewn across the porch and hanging baskets – maybe we’re hosting a bird timeshare, unbeknownst to us?

Now, the small, blue eggs are laid and the mother robin greets us with that big ol’ lidless bird eye every time we’re on our porch.  So I do the only proper thing – I say “good morning” to her as she stares at me and guards the nest from her perch.  She doesn’t even fly away anymore as we open the front door to leave for school and work each day.  Maybe we’re getting the benefits of a pet – I dunno.

As if that weren’t enough, my hubby recently sent me an e-mail entitled “guess who’s in the yard today?”  I earnestly prayed it wasn’t another opossum.  My prayer was granted; as I opened the attachment, I saw two ducks in the photo.  Whew!  What I didn’t know was that they’d carefully and intentionally selected our yard as the site to lay and hatch their eggs…I presume they like rosebushes near the ground and underneath children’s bedroom windows.  I fully expect to see fuzzy baby ducks waddling around pretty soon.

As I watch my hubby’s flurry of activity around the yard to make it habitable and enjoyable for his family, I visualize Jesus with a bird balancing on His index finger and remember that He created all this stuff, so I may as well get with the program and appreciate it. 🙂  May we reverence the Creator more than the creation… 

“And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.”

(Genesis 2:19)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Critter Corner

I am sheepishly posting this entry almost a month after it happened because I was a bit embarrassed!  However, I must write in the spirit of transparency, truth, and disclosure, so that’s what I’m gonna keep on bringing…read on to enjoy the antics of my life! 🙂

Much to my chagrin, I was recently given a reminder of why it takes valleys to appreciate the few and far-between “mountaintop experiences.”  By no means do I consider myself an animal lover (I’d pick a low-maintenance goldfish over a 4-footed pet any day).  Yet, my hubby’s point of a cat’s value in situations like this now has additional validity; I’m warming up to the idea.  My chef hubby kicked off our first Cathcart “Welcome to Spring” event on Saturday, 3/20/10 with an absolutely fantastic weekend grill-out with gourmet turkey burgers for me and hot dogs for the children.  Yet, my euphoria was quickly shattered on the following Tuesday when my son said, “Mom, I see a mouse” as he peered onto the back porch.

Not believing him (though I shouldn’t have doubted Mr. SuperPeepers), I glanced onto the deck through the sliding glass door, and sure enough, there was a tiny four-footed creature staring right back at me.  Then it disappeared…right back under the grill cover.  I gasped; he must’ve wanted some turkey burger, too.  Flabbergasted, I hoped one of the big, hungry robins near the bird feeders would swoop down and take care of this critter in my yard.  It didn’t happen.  Trying to maintain a somewhat composed demeanor in front of my children, I said, “Maybe it’s a baby opossum” as I laughed weakly.  But my son assured me, “No, it really is a mouse.”  Outta the mouths of babes…  I had to agree; at least it was outside.  Now what?!?  My hubby was at a meeting, and once again, I had to hold down the fort (but I was grateful I didn’t have to pull a child’s tooth).  However, I digress…

Now if this had been a spider, I could’ve easily and bravely paralyzed it with contents from a nearby can of air freshener (yes, it really works – and it smells so fresh afterwards, too!).  But this critter had me stumped.  What to do as it scurried about my deck, silently taunting me?  I did what any thinking woman would do – I called a good sistahfriend!  Granted, she lives all the way on the other side of town, but having her commiserate with me until my hubby’s meeting finished sure helped me calm down!  Fast forwarding to my hero arriving home (after I called to ensure he’d make a detour to the home-improvement store for something to destroy my tiny antagonizer):  he arrived with the electronic plug-in repellents and glue traps.  I’m not sure which one did the job, but I haven’t seen one since (let us all breathe a collective sigh of relief)!  And last night’s cookout was pleasant (and yummy – healthy grilled chicken) – but, of course, I was inside while watching my squealing children gleefully run through the sprinkler with careless abandon.  🙂

We are growing closer to a wildlife preserve every day.  There’s gotta be a lesson in this somewhere…I am determined to learn it!!!

“Bring forth with thee every living thing that is with thee, of all flesh, both of fowl, and of cattle, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth; that they may breed abundantly in the earth, and be fruitful, and multiply upon the earth.”

(Genesis 8:17)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Playin’ Possum: High Drama in the Suburbs

It’s time for me to recount another colorful weekend, and I tell ya, this one still makes me laugh!  Please do not drink any beverages while reading this post…don’t say I didn’t warn you.

A couple of weeks ago, our backyard fence was finally completed, a welcome prelude to the warmth of spring, family BBQs, and balmy evenings for my children playing safely outdoors.  Enter one intruder to interrupt this idyllic picture of placidity, and you have a formula for me to witness a murder in my own yard on Saturday before 9:00 a.m.  Well…almost.

Saturday morning, I was up earlier than I would’ve preferred, preparing to head out to a meeting and my wonderful hubby was getting ready to make pancakes for the children.  As he bustled about to complete his routine “morning security check” of our property, he spotted something in the backyard and started dressing quickly.  “Uh oh,” I thought to myself, knowing that my hubby is fiercely protective of his family.  “Whatever it is should prepare to meet its Maker.”   He pointed out an opossum near the fence and I froze; that thing was HUGE.  Next thing I knew, he was dressed in full lumberjack gear and heading toward the fence carrying a big shovel – the heavy one used for snow removal just a few weeks ago.  Equally repulsed and captivated by what was unfolding before my eyes, I braced for the impact, and heard the “whack!”  It wasn’t pretty.  The body stopped moving, but I saw the opossum’s long tail flopping about.  Did I really want to finish eating my high-fiber cereal after this?  I bravely munched on, staring through the sliding glass door as if I was watching HDTV.  I cringed at the next whack(s) – like who’s counting? – then saw my hubby retreating from the yard.  Was he victorious?

He wondered aloud, “Now what am I gonna do with that thing?”  I was wondering the same thing, because it was pretty creepy looking.  “Couldn’t you call Animal Control?” I weakly offered.  He grabbed his phone and dialed.  Yay, teamwork.  “Is it dead?” I asked hesitantly.  “No; I saw some babies peek their heads out, so I knew it was a mother.  I don’t think I have anything sharp enough to kill it, and it hissed at me.  Those things could have rabies.”  “Oh great,” I thought.  “Now we have to wait for the government to come dispose of this creature.”  After he hung up, he reported that it had to be dead before Animal Control would come pick it up, AND (adding insult to injury) we’d have to get it to the front curb for them to pick it up – yikes!  I don’t think that was a risk he was willing to take; I knew I wasn’t!  All I could picture was trying to shovel the fat opossum into a brown paper bag and tying it up in a plastic garbage bag.  That didn’t sound too safe.  I headed to the car en route to my meeting, confident that my hubby had the situation under control and the critter would be gone when I returned.

Five minutes into my drive, my cell phone rang.  “I injured it, but I didn’t kill it,” my hubby reported.  He informed me that the opossum had crawled back through its entry point, a breach in our neighbor’s fence.  “I cancelled the Animal Control call.”  I don’t think he spared its life because it was a mother; I think he knew he was outmatched without the proper tool to remove the animal swiftly and humanely.  And Lord knows what we’d have done with motherless opossum babies scattered about.  At least he reinforced the weak part of our neighbor’s fence with more wood, because my eyes were as big as saucers, visualizing what would happen if the incapacitated party came back for restitution.  I’m almost certain that I heard the melodic strains of “Circle of Life” from The Lion King

Did I mention how wonderful my hubby is?  I can’t imagine how this story would’ve ended if I’d been the party responsible for handling the opossum incident.  I don’t even want to think about it.  I’ve finally summoned my SuperMommy powers so I can kill spiders by myself in one fell swoop – most of them, anyway.  I dare not consider what could’ve been in the backyard if we didn’t have that fence; I don’t think I’m ready to handle animals bigger than that.  Really.

Honestly, before this unfortunate turn of events, the only interaction I’d had with opossums was seeing them as road rugs.  I don’t recall having the privilege of a face-to-face encounter with one.  And I wasn’t at all thrilled to think one (or more) might be roaming around my backyard or wiggling under my deck.  But from this experience (combined with a bit of web research), I’ve learned that an opossum is a marsupial (that means it has a pouch – like a kangaroo) and carries its young.  Sooooo…what is the meaning in all of this?  I hadn’t thought about a spiritual message on Saturday between laughing and squirming, but as I reflect, perhaps it was just a simple reminder from nature that God is always watching, covering, protecting and guiding us.  Just as we watch out for our children, animals care for their young offspring…and God cares for us. 

“He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.”

(Psalm 91:1)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart