Lasting Change

It’s slowly dawning on me that I really don’t want the “old way” anymore.  And it’s exciting to see myself changing, because I did the “old way” very well for so long!  This past weekend, I had my first ice cream cone of the year with my family.  And that was it – one ice cream cone after a balanced dinner at home.  No secretly sneaking to eat it alone between meals in a room behind closed doors. (If it sounds like the “old way” took a lot of scheming and energy, go with that – you’re right).  I didn’t revisit the freezer for a 2nd or 3rd cone (glorious change!).  I was truly content with eating in a more healthy way that would profit my body.  I didn’t even feel deprived when I gave my children some ice cream for dessert last night; I passed up my portion. 

Additionally, God made a way of escape for me when my hubby wanted to treat us to Sunday dinner out so I wouldn’t have to cook – he selected a buffet.  I didn’t say anything to him that morning (gotta appreciate your spouse’s thoughtfulness!), but I prayed that God would give me wisdom in selecting foods from the buffet that would glorify Him and not stuff my body full of junk.  And you know what?  By that afternoon, my hubby had changed his mind – without me saying a word (imagine that!).  He decided that we could eat at home, save some dough (yippee!), and I still didn’t have to cook because we’d prepared well a few days before and had plenty in the fridge.  I was so delighted to eat a chicken breast sandwich topped with bleu cheese dressing, fresh spinach, and red grapes at home!  When I remarked to my hubby, “I definitely wouldn’t have gotten something this healthy at the buffet,” he agreed and we both laughed.

I am grateful that God wouldn’t allow me to eat myself to death – literally.  Why?  Because He has a purpose and a plan for my life that I must fulfill.  So it is with you, my friend.  If you’re facing something that seems absolutely insurmountable and you haven’t gotten victory over it the past 10 times you tried to overcome it, I encourage you to try one more time.  But this time, allow God to change your heart (give Him free reign, holding nothing back for yourself) so you can change your mind, and your lifestyle will begin to change.  He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.  I am a witness!

“But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.”

(Hebrews 11:6)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The Perks of Faithfulness

Gratefully, we arrived safely in Myrtle Beach, SC for our 9th anniversary getaway through a mega-rainstorm (termed by The Weather Channel as the East Coast’s “Winter Wollop 2009”).  At least we were driving away from the direction where snow was forecast. Our reservation (at the hotel where we’d celebrated the previous 2 anniversaries) had been made well in advance.  My hubby had graciously done all the driving (perhaps he didn’t trust the combination of my 20/15 LASIK vision with darkness, torrents of rain, and questionable windshield wiper performance), so he was ready to get comfortable.  He quickly unpacked, then prepared for a shower.  The water ran cold for 5 minutes, and the sink and tub drains were clogged – what a welcome!  He asked me to call the front desk.  I did. 

The gentleman who answered placed me on hold.  After I’d waited patiently for over 2 minutes (sorta), my husband took the phone from me – ready to get some results.  When the hotel staffer got back on the line, my hubby relayed the situation to him.  The man noted how unfortunate it was for us that we were on the side of the building where the water often heats up slowly…I won’t even begin to express my incredulosity and more than slight irritation that he already knew they had an issue with this.  He offered to send someone up immediately to unclog the drains, but we’d still have tepid water temperature.  Calm and collected, my husband asked what he could do for us since this was our anniversary weekend and we’d received good service during our prior visits.  The hotel staffer (finally) offered to move us to another room, which my tired husband was a little more than hesitant to accept.  We were on the top floor, and no other rooms were available on that floor.  The man said, “I can put you in a Junior King Suite with a balcony two floors below” (never mind that it was cold and pouring rain outside).  I vigorously nodded my head “yes!” and my hubby reluctantly accepted the inconvenience of relocating.  After he re-dressed and re-packed, we dragged our bags back down to the front desk to get the new keys we’d been reassigned.  The man assured us we’d like the room.

When we arrived in the suite, we were pleasantly surprised at the level of upgrade we’d received; the suite was triple the size of our initial room, had more than ample walking space, plus a separate sitting area and a Jacuzzi.  Additionally, there was an internet connecting wire (conspicuously missing from the other room) and an even more spectacular ocean view from a different vantage point.  We were well-pleased and started the hot water.  I ambled over to glance at the door and discovered that our suite would normally charge at $1,000 a night for single occupancy and $1,200 a night for double occupancy.  I was amazed and share that info with my hubby; we blessed the Lord together as we reflected on the $80 per night we’d booked at online.  We opted to order something light from room service instead of braving the wind blowing rain sideways.  It was worth the $39 – an elegant serving table complete with cloth tablecloth and napkins rolled in with crab bisque, chicken strips, and French fries for both of us.  Delightful.

Upon check-in, we’d been given complimentary breakfast tickets for both days of our stay that cancelled our need to trek down the street to the local pancake dive.  At about $20 value each day, it more than nicely made up for the $5 daily parking fee in the adjacent garage.  The next evening, we went for a lovely early dinner at our favorite beach restaurant (early in the week, I’d signed up online and received a $5 coupon – cha-ching!).  We got a great server (with no attitude – priceless) and were told we’d receive a complimentary bananas foster ($7.99 value) for dessert since we were celebrating our anniversary with them.  We arrived before 5:00 p.m. and ordered from the lunch menu – our specials (catfish fillet prepared 3 ways; salad included) were executed in excellence.

What can I say about the work it took to get to a lovely weekend where we just enjoyed each other’s company and laughed a LOT?  Perseverance pays off.  We had a blast – each of us accompanied by our best friend – relaxing and taking a break from our daily routine….not to mention sinking into the pillow-top king bed, duvet covers, and down pillows.  Scrumptious.

Our children are safe, well-cared for, and having a fun time with dear family friends.  Mommy and Daddy have become “honey” and “baby” and didn’t have to fix anyone Saturday cereal at 7:00 a.m. while pleading for an 1 more hour of sleep.  Instead, this weekend, we got to reap the fruit of hard work and commitment to living daily in a godly marriage.  I’m glad we’re faithful to God and to each other.  It’s definitely worth it.  The rewards and perks of this weekend were just icing on the cake.  Bon appetit!

© Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

“Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.

Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.”

(Psalm 37:3-5)

Enduring and Overcoming Adversity TOGETHER

A Study from James 1

Marriage Enrichment Session Presenters:  Gibson & Kayren Cathcart 

Division is out there – don’t let it conquer your ministry of marriage!

– Adversity – hardship, difficulty, harsh conditions, hard times
– Division – separation, split, disagreement, discord, break, schism, divide, gulf

Tests & trials:
· Build faith – which brings maturity (James 1:2-4)
· Work patience (James 1:3)
· Bring an opportunity for growth (James 1:5)
· Set you up for blessing/promotion (James 1:12)
· Expose areas of inconsistency (James 1:6-8)
· Bring you closer to each other & to God (James 1:17-18)

Examples of adversity:
· Past – emotional baggage
· Present – financial strain/challenges
· Future – the unknown

Children/discipline issues, working vs. staying at home,
extended family (level of involvement/interaction), unresolved conflict, individual dreams and goals, physical changes or ailments…

Anything of great worth and value WILL be tested
· We must learn to solve problems together as a couple, not just as competent individuals
· Acknowledge strengths and weaknesses (your own and your spouse’s) – cover each other’s insecurities and vulnerabilities

– Endure – bear, undergo, continue, go on, carry on, keep on, persist
– Overcome – prevail over, rise above, triumph over, conquer, defeat
– Together – jointly, as one, collectively, in sync, mutually

Your perspective affects EVERYTHING!

 Combat the spirit of division with:
· Trust-building, open communication, flexibility, & adaptability
· Personal growth and development
· Individual and couples’ counseling
· Have fun together – get to know each other better! (we’re constantly changing)

Recognize the difference between a curse and God’s process…
– Curse – nuisance, pest, bother, irritation, annoyance
– Process – procedure, development, progression, route, course of action

6 Causes of curses:
1. Wickedness & backsliding
2. Did not hearken to the voice of the Lord
3. Would not keep the commandments and statutes
4. To be a sign and wonder to teach you and your children lessons forever
5. Because you did not serve the Lord with joyfulness & gladness of heart for the abundance of all things
6. Because you did not obey the voice of the Lord

Adversity is a tool God may use to take us to another level!

“We never know when our disappointment will be His appointment.” 

– Charles Swindoll

7 Laws of Prosperity:
1. God with man (Genesis 39:1-3)
2. Obedience (Deuteronomy 28:1-14)
3. Meditation (Joshua 1:8)
4. Faith (II Chronicles 20:20)
5. Seeking God (II Chronicles 26:5)
6. Goodness to Israel (Psalm 122:6)
7. Hospitality (Luke 6:38)

3 Reasons some do not prosper:
1. Rebellion against God (Deut. 28:29)
2. Covering sins (Prov. 28:13)
3. Fighting God (Is. 54:17)

Action Steps to Build ONENESS (this is deliberate and intentional!):
· Pray together (as well as individually for your spouse)
· Discuss/share about the Word regularly together
· Give your spouse grace – forgive!
· Speak the truth in love – don’t injure your spouse
· Seek God’s timing for communicating with your spouse

© Copyright 2007 by Kayren J. Cathcart & Gibson Cathcart