Perspective Maintenance

A Mother’s Sacrifice…and Reward

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Like I do just about every 2 weeks, I’m sitting at the local beauty school waiting for my very long and thick-haired daughter to get her as-yet chemically untreated natural mane of crowning glory washed, conditioned, and braided by a lady with a little more patience and a lot more skill than me to do so.  The significant difference is that instead of reading and watching the clock between bouts of entertaining her for 4-5 hours while she gets coiffed, tonight I am springing an extra $8 to get pampered myself.  Granted, I am well able to wash and roller set my own hair (as I generally do between relaxers), but today I decided I’d enjoy the treat.  Wow – what have I been missing?!?  My scalp is way happy right about now as I sit under the dryer conditioning and waiting for my stylist to finish coloring someone else’s tresses.

As mothers, we often forget to allow ourselves time to be rewarded for the many sacrifices we make on a daily basis.  But when we remember, it really helps us to keep our serving and caring for others in perspective.  All giving without being replenished and restored leads to imbalance – honey, don’t I know it!!!  Yet, an occasional splurge (within reason, of course *wink, wink*) doesn’t hurt.  As a matter of fact, it helps.  When we feel relaxed, appreciated, and renewed, there’s no end to the benefits our families reap.  On the flip side, we all know what pent-up resentment coupled with overtiredness and frazzled feelings lead to…and that untimely explosion ain’t pretty!

So do yourself a favor and have that cup of coffee made by someone else; take an extra 10 minutes driving home to enjoy some different scenery; lock the door and luxuriate in that monthly (or quarterly) bubble bath.  Without guilt.  Because you’ve earned it.  If your family can attest to your sacrifices (and most of them speak for themselves), then you more than owe it to yourself to enjoy a reward from time to time.

Who knows?  Next time, I may even add on the $6 manicure.  LOL 🙂

  © Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

”She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.”

(Proverbs 31:27-29)

O Christmas Tree: A Matter of Perspective

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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I’m looking at the most exquisite Christmas tree ever – not because it’s elaborate, expensive, or customized, because it’s none of those things.  The reason is because it’s an expression of our family’s love, togetherness, and building our own traditions.  Personally, I could do without the tree (since I believe Christmas is birthed in our hearts 24/7, not just during this season), but I was vetoed 3-1, so we have a tree and some lights.  I even broke down and spent $1 on some red and green gel clings that I enthusiastically added to the sliding glass door in the kitchen.  Cheery.  When I tried to peel them off the plastic transfer sheet, I realized why they were only $1…grrrr!  But it’s for the children, right? 

Back to the tree.  To me, it first appeared unplanned, un-color coordinated, and not monochromatic (what can I say? I love simple white lights).  Yet, to my 4 and 6 year-old munchkins beaming with pride that their decorations have completed this year’s tree, it’s nothing short of a masterpiece.  It is colorful, bearing the imprint, insignia, fingerprint, and signature of each of their unique personalities expressed through original ornaments made at school.  My husband even added my daughter’s Rudolph (complete with sparkly red puffball nose) to the tree, which is twice the size of all the other ornaments (including the star).  Now I don’t recall why we didn’t have a star last year, but the one my hubby found and nestled among the top branches was a great crowning glory.  As he snores away, I’m enjoying his handiwork with a smile of admiration.  And I reminisce with fond memories of my own first handmade ornament – a spectacular popsicle stick glitter glue-covered Star of David…I’ll bet my mom still has it…somewhere.

On second thought, I think our tree is perfect – just like they do.  🙂

© Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.”

(Isaiah 9:6)

What’s Your Outlook?

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Yesterday was hard.  It was tough to focus, tough to push through.  I was overtired and I’m dealing with some transitions in my work environment – but let’s face it, who isn’t?!  I hardly had the motivation to get off the elevator; yet, when I did finally get settled into my cube, I found myself surfing various news sites and counting down to the moment when I could clock out.  Before I knew it, I’d read several weeks’ worth of Dilbert comics online.  Sound familiar?

As I commuted home, I was so convicted that I hadn’t been an effective steward of the time, life, health, and strength I’d been given for that 24-hour span that I determined to make today better.  Amazingly, it seemed God become the wind beneath my wings to help bring that to pass.  Today, it didn’t seem so laborious to start my morning.  I spoke to someone kind who was waiting for the train.  There was a melody in my heart.  I thought of one work-related task I could accomplish today – and I did it!  Things started looking up.

I guess the choice was mine all along!  What attitude will you choose today?

© Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

“I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live.”

(Deuteronomy 30:19)

Clear the Clutter to Get Victory in Your Secret Place

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“Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.”

(Proverbs 4:23, Amplified)

How many of us have emotional baggage and mental clutter that gets in the way when we realize our need to press into the presence of God?  Let me be the first one to raise my hand!  Too often, we allow issues, concerns, and circumstances to accumulate and gather steam.  Instead of releasing them to God and allowing the breath of the Holy Spirit to blow them away, we give life to the very things that come to choke the life out of us.  What started as a question has grown into full-blown worry; what began as a gnawing feeling of insecurity has mushroomed into a cloud of doubt; and what was initially apprehension has spun out of control into a tornado of fear.  Before we know it, confusion looms overhead as a daunting force to be reckoned with – and we wonder, “Where did that come from?!”  A foreign substance has infiltrated your secret place, but I have good news: it doesn’t have to stay that way!

Secret means confidential, private, restricted, covert, clandestine, and concealed.  Everyone doesn’t (and shouldn’t) have access to things classified as secret!  The heart is the secret place where God desires to dwell and have habitual fellowship with us.  When we lead a double life or “straddle the fence” (because we’re not honest with God, ourselves, or others), the secret place becomes defiled. 

Inconsistencies between our talk and our walk reveal a need for God’s intervention and a commitment on our part to be transformed by the power of His Word.  The scripture says we must “keep and guard” our hearts – these are action words, not passive terms!   People who exhibit behavior contrary to the Word of God (which they may even profess!) indicate that they have a problem with boundaries, obedience, and God-given authority.  Behind their destructive or addictive habits, they’re screaming out, “I’m hurt!”  They accepted a “substitute fix” – but alas, it doesn’t satisfy the hunger growing in the pit of their souls.  They say they have faith, but they’re terrified deep down on the inside.  They say they love their brothers and sisters, but something bubbles in the pit of their stomach when they see them.  They say they have peace, but they find no rest.  These are the things God wants to address in the secret place – because when you get quiet, you have to face the real you and deal with your issues of trust and intimacy with God. 

You might be thinking, “That’s not me!  But I know somebody else who fits those characteristics!”  However, I encourage you to examine your own secret place closely.

When the spirit of compromise enters your heart, you’ll rationalize, justify, and make excuses – but all that matters is the truth of God’s Word.  To probe a little deeper in this area, ask God to help you identify:

  • What issue do you avoid facing and dealing with?
  • What obstacle appears impossible to overcome?
  • What challenge do you feel inadequate to conquer?
  • What terrifying fear has gripped and paralyzed you?

To walk upright in integrity is priceless – but it is attainable.  Give God unrestricted access to your secret place today – He will bring to light those things that have been hidden in plain sight from you.  He’ll uncover the treasures He placed in you that were tangled with the clutter of negative thoughts and images.  And He’ll cleanse you of those things you tried to hide, but no longer have need of.   May the clear springs of life flow from your heart forevermore…

To get victory in your secret place:

  1. Stop where you are – don’t get in deeper!
  2. Cry out to God earnestly and repent – humble yourself.
  3. Ask for God’s help and direction – listen!
  4. Obey! Begin to walk in the direction He shows you, without hesitation.

© 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Steal Away to Jesus

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Disclaimer: Everything stated in this article is applicable to the author!  How about you?

“Steal away, steal away, steal away to Jesus!
Steal away, steal away home,
I ain’t got long to stay here.”

Lyrical Excerpt from “Steal Away to Jesus”

A Negro Spiritual by James Weldon Johnson and John Rosamond Johnson

Why does it seem so hard for us to pull away from the things we KNOW are keeping us from abiding in true peace?  Why do we allow the all-too-familiar speed bump of the status quo to slow us down on the road to progress and success?  Could it be that we’re unwilling to make a clean break from what we intellectually know, visibly see, and mentally comprehend with our finite minds?  Maybe we subconsciously think, “Well, it’s not that bad, right?”  Is it possible there’s something deep down inside that wants to hold onto that habit, relationship, behavior, attitude, or memory? 

Perhaps you have recently found yourself thinking thoughts similar to these:

  • “Nobody else can organize/coordinate/orchestrate/manage this like I can.”
  •  “There just aren’t enough hours in the day to finish all that I have to accomplish!”
  • “I could delegate this task, but it won’t get done the way I want it to be completed.”

If so, you need to steal away to Jesus – soon.  Why?  Because the process will remind you that you’re not indispensable – only He is.  You are not a wonderful sensation or a marvelous phenomenon – you are a vessel He has selected and chosen for His use.  Only when His glory is manifested can you reflect it to this lost and dying world – and offer the hope of salvation that comes only through Him.  Yet, you are simply a vessel – one that carries the glory of Almighty God.  Always remember that it’s not your glory in the first place.  If you are so busy doing for others that you haven’t been replenished in His presence – beware!  You’ll be dispensing from your own reserves instead of tapping into Him as the endless Source.  And that, my friend, is a recipe for disaster.

Steal away means to “sneak out, slip out, slip away, exit, leave.”  It means to slip away from your regular activities and daily routine to seek His face.  Leave whatever you’re doing and get back to the basics – the core essence of your being.  Exit the madness and swirling torrents of drama threatening to overtake you.  When you spend time in the Lord’s presence, He’ll adjust your perspective and show you what’s really important –His priorities for your life.  It makes things much simpler; you don’t have to figure it out after all – just obey His instructions.  You’ll realize “I ain’t got long to stay here.”  With that focus, you’ll be able to turn your attention to the activities and assignments you were sent to do – instead of allowing extraneous things to accumulate on your plate to the point of overwhelming you.

Years ago, as I enthusiastically described my first “real” job to my Dad (and the ink on my newly-minted college degree was still wet), he took that precise opportunity to burst my little bubble and give me a heaping dose of reality.  With over twenty years of military service and plenty of “real world” life experience under his belt, I consider him to be a pretty trustworthy resource.  He looked me straight in the eyes and said, “If you think you’re indispensable to your job – DIE.  Then see if they don’t fill your seat with someone else to do your job…while the seat is warm.”  His words hurt my feelings a bit (and bruised my ego a lot!), but as time passed, I’ve had to acknowledge how right he was.  It set me on an early path of learning to balance the demands and expectations of others with taking responsibility for cultivating my own quality of life.  I share those sage words with others who need a reality check.

For some strange reason, we think we’re supposed to be “super saints” who do it all – 24/7.  Not so!  Even our supreme example, Jesus, took time away from the crowds, noise, and hustle and bustle of everyday life.  In Matthew 15, he took several opportunities after serving others to “get away from it all” and retreat into the presence of His Father.  Depending on where you stand today and the boundaries you’ve set (and honor) for yourself, “flying under the radar” or “going off the grid” may seem like an action-movie fantasy or a harsh, drastic decision.  However, sometimes it’s absolutely necessary.  Often, we tell folks too much of our personal business, grant them unlimited access to our innermost thoughts, and expect answers, solutions, and validation they cannot provide.  The intimacy we’re searching for in people must first be secured in our relationship with Christ.  So don’t delay…steal away to Jesus!

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart,

and you will find rest for your souls.

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

(Matthew 11:28-30, NIV)

 “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion?  Come to me.

Get away with me and you’ll recover your life.  I’ll show you how to take a real rest.  Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it.  Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.  I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.  Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

(Matthew 11:28-30, The Message)

© Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Don’t Neglect the Gift Within You

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“Do not neglect your gift…”

(I Timothy 4:14, NIV)

Many times, gifts that God Himself has given us lie dormant.  We’ve allowed precious treasures He has entrusted to our care and stewardship to be hidden, inactive, and underdeveloped.  Often, we don’t really venture outside of our comfort zones until the pressure we’re experiencing becomes almost unbearable.  Then, under the weight, we finally yield and say, “Okay God – You win!!!”  When a storm comes to shake us out of our grogginess and complacency, we cry out, “Mercy!  Please help me, Lord!”

It is imperative that you cultivate, nurture, develop, and mature your gift.  If it weren’t important, Timothy’s mentor wouldn’t have admonished him to “stir up the gift of God that is in you” (II Timothy 1:6).  Was Timothy lazy, fearful, or just comfortable?  Perhaps he just wasn’t operating at maximum efficiency and effectiveness.  As a matter of fact, Paul seemed to admonish him to shake off his comfortable contentment with the status quo and stop settling for the mediocre and familiar.

If this sounds like a place where you find yourself, it’s time to give your gifts a wake-up call!  Repent, pray for direction, commit to purposeful action, and GET MOVING!  Your gift will take you into the arena of greatness (Proverbs 18:16).  Be so focused and single-minded in tending to your gift and executing God’s purpose that external influences and distractions cease to matter.  I’ll admit that it’s not easy or passive activity.  Jude 1:3 admonishes us to “earnestly contend for the faith.”  That means it’s going be a press.  Sometimes we’ll have to fight; yet, Matthew 11:12 tells us “…the kingdom of heaven suffereth violence, and the violent take it by force.”  I dare say that your destiny is worth fighting for.  The purpose of resistance, opposition, and pressure is to propel you toward opportunity – which is cleverly disguised as adversity!  Will you polish your gift and seize the opportunity? 

What will you do with the door opened by your gift?

 The world anticipates your response…and destiny awaits your embrace.

© Copyright 2008 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Contents Under Pressure

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“We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia.  We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life.  Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death.  But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”

(II Corinthians 1:8-9, NIV)

Is it just me, or is this a time of intense (and yet increasing) pressure?  Pressure can be defined as “force, weight, heaviness, stress, strain, demand, load, burden, or difficulty.”  Does any of that sound familiar to you?  Everywhere you look these days, pressure is evident.  Sometimes it feels like more than we can bear, but we must keep putting one foot in front of the other to make progress – no matter how fast or slow we seem to be moving.

We’re all hesitant to shake a warm soda can before opening it.  Why?  Because the contents have been packaged under pressure.  When we “pop the top,” the pressure is released, and what was on the inside definitely comes out.  When the pressure you’re under now is released, what will flow from you?  Will it be true worship, praise, thanksgiving, and adoration to God for bringing you through the trial?  Our attitude when navigating through the tests will determine what comes out when the pressure diminishes.

Make no mistake – pressure exists, and today’s pressure is real.  However, the purpose of pressure in the life of a Christian is significant and undeniable.  Pressure is what transforms a lump of coal into a diamond, what differentiates a victim from a victor, and what converts a worrier into an intercessor.  Through the pressure in your life, choose to rely on God even more, then watch Him mold, shape, and form you as He sees fit.

Are you a diamond in the rough or a jewel in the making?

Yield to the pressure and allow God to transform you for HIS glory!

© Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Make A Determined Decision To Be Disciplined

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I fell off the wagon again…in my dedication to working out.  Yeah, I’m referring to the exercise routine I excitedly testified about a month ago.  The good news:  after somewhat successfully ducking my trainer for over three weeks (though we attend the same church), I repented and got back on track.  Why?  Because I need the results and I want the benefits.  When I tried to find a loophole by LYING to myself, “I’ll just work out at home by myself tomorrow” (and subsequently I saw the image of myself getting cozy with a half gallon of ice cream), I immediately sent a text message to my trainer asking, “What time are we meeting to work out tomorrow?”  Romans 13:14 tells us to make no provision for the flesh; I had to shut down that rationalizing quickly!  So once more, I find myself in the uncomfortable place of full disclosure and utter transparency.  Yet, that’s the only way to live free, for confession is good for the soul (James 5:16).  I’m not perfect, but I am being perfected!

For me, it’s not just about exercising – it’s about being disciplined in every area of my life.  And it’s about obedience to God, which is better than any sacrifice I can make.  Avoidance of discipline in one area just magnifies the fact that something is going on in another part of my life.  God wants us to deal with the things we attempt to sweep under the rug.  There’s something strangely cathartic about “coming clean” and straightening up.  I feel as if heaven and earth are moving to help me get into the right position; in this season, I’m so grateful God has given me:

  • a patient manager who models great habits for me to emulate;
  • a firm, pull-no-punches, yet loving husband who consistently practices what he preaches and encourages me to do the same; and
  • supportive pastors, friends, co-workers, and fellow church members who hold me accountable.

Each individual holds a piece of the puzzle and plays a role in helping me advance to the next level of growth, development, and maturity.  “Gee whiz!” I thought incredulously.  “I must’ve really tried to circumvent this process on a regular basis throughout the years…and here I am, still having to face it…and deal with it.”  Coasting on your talents and gifts cannot take the place of living a disciplined life.  I should know, because I’ve tried to get around it – and God repeatedly headed me off at the pass!  The excuses of sticking to a written schedule being “limiting to my creativity,” healthy eating being “restrictive to my taste buds,” getting up early being “diametrically opposed to my natural night-owl tendencies,” and using files instead piles for my papers being “counterproductive to my personal system of organization” don’t amount to a hill of beans!  I am responsible for being a good steward over what God entrusts to me, which often requires change from doing business as usual.  And sustaining any long-lasting change requires – ugh! – discipline.

A few weeks ago, I attended the National Holy Ghost Jubilee Conference in Chicago.  Our theme “For the Pulling Down of Strongholds” was thoroughly explored. I was challenged to change by excellent teaching and preaching with messages including:

“Get the Devil Outta Your Mind” (Elder Kenneth Dunlap), “Dimensions of Deliverance – They’re Not All Equal” (Pastor Reginald Blackmon), and “It’s Time for Some Execution!” (Bishop Charles A. Gibson).  Armed with all of that Word, I returned to NC and still had to face ME!  I’d like to share some nuggets I’ve learned by experience this month – I hope they’re helpful:

  • You can tell that your standard has shifted when you now tolerate what used to aggravate you.
  • Set clear boundaries that don’t blur when your mood changes.
  • It ceases to be a battle when you make up your mind for real – you only struggle with what you want to hold onto.
  • Stop fixating on your problem/issue/concern – focus on Christ and HIS solution…it’s custom tailored to fit YOU!

If you’re like me, you spend an inordinate amount of time anticipating what might go wrong.  This is futile and fruitless activity!  Purpose not to be the roadblock to your own blessings.  Make the necessary corrections when you’re convicted; don’t keep going down the wrong path!  Wisdom is putting good information to good use.  Go forth in victory as you make a determined decision to be disciplined in your own life. 

© Copyright 2008 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The Power of Purpose: Making Your Life Count

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“Before I shaped you in the womb, I knew all about you.
Before you saw the light of day, I had holy plans for you:
A prophet to the nations – that’s what I had in mind for you.”

Jeremiah 1:5 (The Message)

It is powerful to know your true identity and why you exist.  The Bible gives in-depth illustrations of many people who either arrived on the scene knowing why they were created or, through the course of life, discovered their guiding purpose for being on the planet.

  • Jeremiah received personal assurance from God that he was equipped to take on the tasks appointed to him – despite his age. 
  • Deborah was a prophetess who gave insight for a great national victory during wartime – a well-respected and honorable woman in a male-dominated society. 
  • Joseph was destined for greatness and achieved it – regardless of the “haters” within his family. 
  • Esther delivered her people from utter destruction – by her obedience, wisdom, dedication to prayer, and willingness to take a risk. 
  • Daniel was set apart for wise leadership and empowered to pass every test placed before him – from interpretation of a king’s forgotten dreams to deliverance from a lion’s den.
  • Mary was hand-selected to bring forth God’s greatest gift – above all others. 

The list goes on.  I have good news: you are included in this list!  Whenever you examine, discover, and embrace your purpose, the heart’s cry, “Why am I here, Lord?” is inevitably addressed.

Luke 1:31-33 depicts how Jesus’ purpose and greatness was made known to His mother before He was in her womb.  Jesus’ earthly ministry lasted three years, and much preparation took place before he launched out.  Yet, those three years were packed with power, miracles, changed lives, and the demonstration of God’s glory.  Quality of time, not quantity, made the difference as Jesus impacted those who came across His path.  To some, three years seems like a short time; to others, it’s a long time – it all depends on what you’re setting out to accomplish.  Romans 14:12 reminds us that “every one of us shall give account of himself to God.” How are you living in light of that fact?

As a person of faith, you may often reflect on the fact that you have been given the priceless gift of life – and with that, a certain amount of time (your life span) is allotted for you to fulfill the purpose God created just for you.  In Luke 16, Jesus told the story of a rich man with a servant who got “called on the carpet.”  His master confronted him, “Give an account of your stewardship!”  When this man realized his position was in jeopardy, he immediately got busy being productive for his master’s benefit.

Each of us faces a similar moment of truth today.  When God glimpses you, does He see you fervently serving Him – or your own interests?  He expects His faithful children to commit to using the gifts He entrusted to them (time, talent, energy, skills, abilities, etc.) to profit and promote His Kingdom.  Over 2,000 years later, Jesus’ life holds a legacy that we continue to benefit from.  Are your actions today creating a legacy that will bless those who look beneath the surface of your life?  Power in action will cause you to be a wise investor and not a resource waster! 

Knowing your purpose and the power provided for you to fulfill it will guide and direct your path, help you select the activities in which you participate, influence where you decide to invest your time, and impact the people (positive or negative) you allow to sow into your lives.  During your personal time of meditation, consider reading Psalm 139:13-16 and Isaiah 49:1-5 to appreciate the fact that you were designed for a specific purpose.  Greatness lies within YOU.  Tap in and allow God to powerfully direct your purpose; it will make a difference in your life.

After all, walking in your purpose with power is what life is all about.

Enjoy the journey…

© Copyright 2008 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Your Life – Make It Count!

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“So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.”

(Romans 14:12)

Jesus’ earthly ministry lasted three years.  Yet, those three years were packed with power, miracles, changed lives, and the demonstration of God’s glory.  Quality of time, not quantity, made the difference as Jesus impacted those who came across His path.  To some, three years seems like a short time; to others, it’s a long time – it all depends on what you’re setting out to accomplish. 

As Christians, we are approaching the greatest celebration of life, the Resurrection of Jesus Christ.  During this season, reflect on the fact that you have been given the priceless gift of life – and with that, a certain amount of time (your life span) is allotted for you to fulfill the purpose God created just for you.  In Luke 16, Jesus told the story of a rich man with a servant who got “called on the carpet.”  His master confronted him, “Give an account of your stewardship!”  When this man realized his position was in jeopardy, he immediately got busy being productive for his master’s benefit.

Each of us faces a similar moment of truth today.  When God glimpses you, does He see you fervently serving Him – or your own interests?  He expects His faithful children to commit to using the gifts He entrusted to them (time, talent, energy, skills, abilities, etc.) to profit and promote His Kingdom.  Over 2,000 years later, Jesus’ life holds a legacy that we continue to benefit from.  Are your actions today creating a legacy that will bless those who look beneath the surface of your life?  Resurrection power in action will cause you to be a wise investor and not a resource waster!

What are you doing with the precious life God has given you?

© Copyright 2008 by Kayren J. Cathcart