purpose

In A Moment…

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…in the twinkling of an eye…

At first, my husband kindly offered to take my daughter on the last day of the cross-town trek to her summer technology opportunity (I was traumatized by the treacherous traffic gridlock I’d experienced 2 days prior; I think he felt sorry for me). Then his schedule changed, so it was back in my lap for that morning’s pick-up and drop-off activities. However, it put me perfectly on schedule for where I was supposed to be. I even made it to my 9am meeting ON TIME…in spite of rush hour traffic.

The swipe card reader was broken where I usually enter the elevators, so I had to go to the main lobby for access. This put me at the elevator bank with one of our senior leaders (who is totally personable and approachable). I spoke to her and she complimented my polka dot lunch bag. As we waited for the elevator, she told me she was texting a co-worker (whom I knew of)…and told me that the lady’s teenage daughter had passed away in an accident the past weekend. This same executive had unexpectedly lost her young daughter several years ago, so support and encouragement from her carries the weight of a parent who has gone through the grieving process firsthand. I gave her a hug and told her she was SO much more than her job, then the elevator whisked her up to the top floor of our building. 

It was a sobering thought that put everything in perspective for me. As I began to pray for the bereaved family, suddenly that beastly traffic didn’t seem like such a burdensome sacrifice for the daughter I’d just dropped off. In the big scheme of the cosmos, my unplanned personal schedule change and what seemed like subsequent obstructions weren’t about me pressing to make it to my conference call on time. It was about being mindful enough to connect on a human level – in real time – with the people around me who are greatly loved by God. May we always remember to let our light shine…wherever we find ourselves.

“51 Behold, I shew you a mystery;
We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,
52 In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye,
at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound,
and the dead shall be raised incorruptible,
and we shall be changed.
55 O death, where is thy sting?
O grave, where is thy victory?
57 But thanks be to God,
which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”
(I Corinthians 15:51-52, 55, 57)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Can These Bones Yet Live Again?

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When I saw the dry and shriveled-up rose earlier this month, I was saddened – it had been so beautiful as it bloomed, and I enjoyed seeing it from my window or when I drove past. However, my sadness didn’t last very long…I discovered new blooms in that same moment just by adjusting my perspective. When I shifted my glance from that which appeared to be dead, I saw that there was still vibrant life thriving not far away. My heart rejoiced while beholding the beauty!

May we receive our Heavenly Father’s gentle and poignant reminder that some things that appear to be dead are only dormant…and dormancy lasts for only a season before life re-emerges. “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

Let us rest in Him as we trust His process…cycles come AND go…and go AND come…

“Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him…”
(Psalm 37:7a)

“3 And he said unto me, Son of man, can these bones live?
And I answered, O Lord God, thou knowest.
4 Again he said unto me,
Prophesy upon these bones, and say unto them,
O ye dry bones, hear the word of the Lord.
5 Thus saith the Lord God unto these bones;
Behold, I will cause breath to enter into you, and ye shall live:
6 And I will lay sinews upon you, and will bring up flesh upon you, and cover you with skin, and put breath in you,
and ye shall live; and ye shall know that I am the Lord.”
(Ezekiel 37:3-6)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Lifecycle: Phases of Growth

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Rose in 3 stages

Rose in 3 stages

One frame encapsulated 3 phases of the growth cycle: life (center), death (bottom), and rebirth (unopened bud at the top). And they were all connected to the same root – that’s kinda wild. But it’s all interrelated and interconnected.

The other thing I can’t figure out for the life of me is how the roses on the SAME bush in my yard were clearly beige and pink blush in September 2018 (reference “Beauty in the Midst of Imperfection” 9/7/18 post), then they were yellow in this May 2019 photo, and when they re-emerged in July 2019, they were beige and pink blush again.

Chalk up yet another majestic win for the Creator of EVERYTHING! May we all continue to grow in Him…

“11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.”
(Genesis 1:11)

“4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine;
no more can ye, except ye abide in me.
5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit:
for without me ye can do nothing.
6 If a man abide not in me, he is cast forth as a branch, and is withered; and men gather them, and cast them into the fire, and they are burned.
7 If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.
8 Herein is my Father glorified, that ye bear much fruit;
so shall ye be my disciples.”
(John 15:4-8)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Cleansing Cometh: More Transition…Really?!

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Trust me – this IS progress; the drawer WAS fully stuffed yesterday…

So a co-worker called me the offensive “h-word” today…no, not heifer…hoarder. I smarted as if I’d been stung by a bee, wondering where that zinger came from. I thought I had made progress. And I had, until it became incumbent upon me to prepare for the inevitable office move of less than 50 feet to the other side of the SAME floor (side glance – now what executive thought this was an efficiency-saver?! Riiight…). With 2 days to go, I was definitely under pressure and behind the power curve.

Honestly, I can understand my co-worker’s point (I know she meant no harm, and it really was ridiculous the amount of stuff I’d collected while sitting there since 2014 – and of course I brought a few things from previous roles, too. Or maybe more than a few, it seems…). I also understood the moving coordinators who stopped by ever-so-often to gently inquire if I was gonna make the “be off the floor ‘cuz the movers are here” Friday at 2pm deadline. As the pressure mounted, I felt myself getting more overwhelmed. (I’d already had a mini-meltdown when stripping the cube walls earlier in the week – everything looked so stark, empty, and blank. Then I saw my children’s baby pictures and reflected on my youngest now heading to high school and the tears started leaking out of my eyelids. It wasn’t a pretty moment. Thankfully, it passed quickly).

As I toted papers to the shred bin, another co-worker peeked her head out from behind her computer monitor – a new employee who I noticed like to write, just like me. However, I discovered her hidden superpower today: organizing. She watched me swoosh past her desk several times frantically ferrying the many small to mid-sized boxes I’d accumulated over years of administrative support “just in case someone needs ‘em, I’ve got ‘em!” Finally she asked me, “Are you OK?” And I sheepishly whispered that I’d just been called a hoarder and I needed to speed up my purging if I was gonna make the packing deadline without the movers tossing any remaining unpacked items – of which I had many lingering.

With a single sentence, she tossed me a lifesaver of hope, “When you get to your new cube, we’re going to get you off to a fresh, new, organized workspace.” Wow – someone who barely knew me was offering to help me (because it was obvious that I desperately needed assistance since my plan to keep accumulating and stuffing had finally reached the breaking point – no pun intended…I think my file drawers were at capacity).

So today’s lesson is this: At some point, you’ve gotta take some stuff out to maintain a healthy balance; you can’t keep shovin’ stuff in. This goes for emotions, relationships, food, whatever…

Let the cleansing continue.

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My desk & shelves haven’t been this empty since I moved into this cube in 2014…I’m learning to travel lighter – that’s for sure!

“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”
(Psalm 51:10)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Moving Tales: Preparing to Sojourn

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To you, it may appear to be a messy gaggle of office products, but to me, the beautifully arrayed colors of these lovely items spell office product BLISS. Who knew that many binder clips lay nestled in my files, multiplying and plotting their takeover? (given the right moment and opportunity, it could happen…)

I was too embarrassed to even snap a pic of the “just in case” pineapple chunks that I’d obviously had so long that the can had popped, the product had disintegrated, crusted over, and evaporated to half its former juicy volume, and there was brown rust everywhere in that bag. Out of an abundance of caution, I tossed the can of lentil soup labeled “best before 2013.” Volunteering at Second Harvest Food Bank should’ve reminded me that there really is such a thing as shelf life. How is it that I hadn’t gone in that file drawer for so long that I was unaware of the biological hazard lurking behind me every day?! Geesh!

Is there never a time when I’m not in transition? Maybe God plans it that way so we constantly have to depend on HIM for strength, guidance, direction, instruction, correction – and to be sustained. Because growth doesn’t occur naturally when we stay in the same position too long. We’re built to grow and develop. It would look crazy for an almost-adult 12th Grader to sit in a kindergarten-sized chair every day. I know this, yet I balk when it comes time to change and get uncomfortable with something else unfamiliar. And since I’m not all-knowing (while God IS all-knowing), I should just embrace this as the way things are – by His divine design.

“8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
(Isaiah 55:8-9)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Purging My Burgeoning Past: Approaching the End of an Epoch

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Old files that I decided to ROLL to the shred bin for the sake of time…and that was just the second load of the second day!

It’s an office move…these things happen every day, all around the world – why is this one impacting me so significantly? Why does it feel like a major theatrical production from my perspective? I mean, how sentimental is it to clean out old meeting agendas and filed, approved, and paid expense reports for a manager I don’t even support any more…and haven’t for over 3 years? She has moved on…why haven’t I? It may have something to do with my college friends recently revealing they nicknamed me MacGyver because I was always prepared. I laughed out loud…I guess I’ve always been the caring nurturer who tried to care for everyone and take care of everything. Until the accumulation became to great to bear – I ran out of emotional capital. So I find myself in more introspection and reflection.

Why the emotional attachment to stuff I haven’t touched in months…or years? I dare admit to myself that it a grasp for security of the familiar. Not that the familiar is even comfortable, but I kinda know what to expect. I know where to look if I need it, and that brings me some tinge of security…but is it a false peace? Is it misplaced trust? Well of COURSE it is, silly rabbit!

If I’m honest with myself, I think it’s because just about every area of my life is going through transition at the same time…and it’s absolutely uncomfortable and terrifying. Yet at the same time, maybe I have a bit of hopeful expectation of something different, better, fresh, not yet experienced. It has the potential to be exhilarating and scary – but yielding great new growth…like in a forest after a brush fire kinda way. New day, new beginnings.

I’ll be sitting in a different seat, in a different position, with a different vantage point. So looking at the same familiar things will appear different. And maybe that’s what God has wanted for me all along…yield, surrender, give in…again…for the first time…another adventuresome journey awaits. Am I ready? It doesn’t matter as long as His presence goes with me, proceeds me, and covers me. And He can do all 3 things at the same time, so I guess all this fretting has been an exercise in corporate futility…kinda like moving 50 feet to say “look what we did!” I reiterate: activity does NOT always equal productivity…but that’s just my 2 cents’ worth.

“6 Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8 Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.”
(Psalm 51:6-8)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Living the Sumptuous Life: Smoked Turkey Wing Facial

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My hubby was simmering cabbage with smoked turkey wings for a luscious meal complement this past weekend. I hastily walked by as the steam escaped beneath the big pot’s lid. Then I backtracked – drawn in by the promise of the yummy meal unfolding before my very eyes, and I captured a modicum of mommy bliss – right in my kitchen.

Inhaling the velvety aroma, I allowed my skin to be moistened by the warm mist. I lingered as the kitchen warmth engulfed me. I smiled and mused on not needing a spa appointment when boiling water is so readily available. And at that moment, all was well with the world.

In the midst of everything you have going on, what fleeting moment have you chosen to capture and savor this week? Please feel free to share in the comments…and let me know what dish YOU try for your next impromptu home facial! LOL 🙂 #CarpeDiem #CarpeSmokedTurkeyWingFacial  

“O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.”
(Psalm 34:8)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Dusk/Nightfall: Time to Replenish

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You know morning comes again after the darkness. And you still yourself and endure just a little while longer. The moon and the ever-changing sky palette were a perfect recap to this full week. Taking a moment to savor my progression was a welcome respite.

I took time for my cardio activity, not being concerned about anyone else for that 30 minutes. It wasn’t selfish; it was restorative. As an adult, I’ve come to realize that while my matriarchal role models could nurture the ever-living daylights out of someone (or everyone in their sphere of influence), they didn’t generally model self-care effectively – or at all. So I’m learning (of a necessity) how to do this now. Acknowledging that taking care of others doesn’t have to occur at the expense of neglecting myself. Balance is possible – when you make it an intentionally incorporated part of the process – it doesn’t happen on its own!  

Sometimes my own self-care is the best of intentions with weak (or no) execution. Sometimes it’s trial-and-error. But sometimes – like today – I nail it! So I celebrate my success without guilt. Because what good am I to others if there’s nothing left to give? Exactly…

How can you intentionally celebrate your own prelude to joy this week? Give it some thought. Feel free to share in the comments if you’d like.

“5 For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
10 Hear, O Lord, and have mercy upon me: Lord, be thou my helper.
11 Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness;
12 To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.”
(Psalm 30:5, 10-12 KJV)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Sterile/Sterilized Relationships

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Tough to admit to myself – let alone to others, but I realize after reading Matthew 18:15 that I’ve pretty much had an emotional condom at the ready in most of my friendships – just in case things got heated! Not wanting to be fully transparent and unable to yield to complete intimacy for fear of being unliked, unaccepted, misunderstood, or just downright rejected. Trying to protect myself from as-yet-unhappened hurts (but bracing for their potential occurrence). That’s why I wore a mask and tried to only show the “good parts” of me. But that’s unreal. Not human. Did that make me an alien? LOL. No, but it did contribute to the existence of a very tormented, agonizing human.

Trying to broker all these moving pieces in multiple dynamic relationships was like spinning a bunch of plates. And when the exhaustion of trying to manage the not-meant-to-be-managed process caused me to fray, I went kaput and the gears stopped turning and the wheels ground to a screeching halt. The plates began to crash as I no longer had the energy to meticulously attend to each one wobbling out of control – just beyond my grasp and inability to “fix it.”  And I was left to examine myself, and the trail of fragmented relationships strewn on the path behind me.

Then a funny thing happened: God caused me to start revisiting those relationships. Not to reopen old wounds, but for the purpose of closure. So I could see that – even in the midst of my own imperfections, shortcomings, and mistakes (of which there are many) – He was able to bring healing to my broken places if I would but allow Him access. Vulnerable place? You betcha. But it’s where I find myself. And when you come to understand that being on the Potter’s wheel is exactly where He wants you so He can fashion an even more exquisite vessel out of the disparate pieces of your life, a certain level of peace comes. I remain in progress and in process…

“Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.”
(Matthew 18:15)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Offline for System Maintenance

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marred – spoiled, corrupted, ruined, injured, rotted

Preventive maintenance is better than a partial – or total – system failure (and subsequent shutdown)…mayday, mayday! Alert! Caution! Pay attention!

Though both scenarios involve not being able to access the system, when unavailability is planned, you can better prepare and respond. Making advanced arrangements and calculated adjustments can be smoother than in-the-moment, real-time reactions.

The off duty bus displays an “Out of Service” sign. Bathrooms do, too. “Closed for repairs.” “Pardon our progress.” So can a person hang an “Under Construction” sign around their neck? I’m just sayin’…it behooves us to be mindful of where people are in their process of being formed – or reformed – for the Master’s use and good pleasure.

“And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made it again another vessel, as seemed good to the potter to make it.”
(Jeremiah 18:4)

© Copyright 2019 by Kayren J. Cathcart