Gratitude

Intrinsic Value

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Along with planting a vegetable (and fruit) garden, my wonderful hubby has decided to create a bird sanctuary…in our backyard.  It’s a rather noble endeavor, because our children seem to enjoy seeing wildlife up close and personal (with the exception of the opossum duly noted in my previous blog entry).  And surprisingly enough for this indoors-loving bookworm, so am I.

One birdfeeder obviously wasn’t enough, so he headed to the home improvement store to purchase 2 more seed feeders, plus a nectar feeder because he “wanted to see some hummingbirds.”  Isn’t it fantastic when we can appreciate God’s creation with childlike fascination?  “Indeed, he is a compassionate man,” I noted as he strategically placed the full feeders throughout the yard and secured them with hooks.  I would’ve casually tossed out some stale bread crusts, deemed it a community service event benefitting the environment, and called it a day. 

But he must be rubbing off on me – and leading by example – since I found myself talking to a tiny bird while waiting for the train yesterday.  I even offered it some seed if it could find its way to my house…but of course, it wouldn’t find my house, now would it?  As the bird flew away, I remembered that my signature solo wherever I sang as a teenager – many moons ago – was “His Eye is On the Sparrow.”  Then I experienced one of those epiphanic moments of understanding when everything converges all at once and in one place – and I remembered how truly special I am to God.  “He’s been thinking about me for all these years!” I gasped.  Have you considered that lately?  Take a moment to gratefully reflect on what He’s been saying to you this week…you may see what you’re really worth in a different light.

“Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And yet not one of them is forgotten or uncared for in the presence of God.

But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.  Do not be struck with fear or seized with alarm; you are of greater worth than many flocks of sparrows.”

(Luke 12:6-7, Amplified Bible)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Lasting Change

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It’s slowly dawning on me that I really don’t want the “old way” anymore.  And it’s exciting to see myself changing, because I did the “old way” very well for so long!  This past weekend, I had my first ice cream cone of the year with my family.  And that was it – one ice cream cone after a balanced dinner at home.  No secretly sneaking to eat it alone between meals in a room behind closed doors. (If it sounds like the “old way” took a lot of scheming and energy, go with that – you’re right).  I didn’t revisit the freezer for a 2nd or 3rd cone (glorious change!).  I was truly content with eating in a more healthy way that would profit my body.  I didn’t even feel deprived when I gave my children some ice cream for dessert last night; I passed up my portion. 

Additionally, God made a way of escape for me when my hubby wanted to treat us to Sunday dinner out so I wouldn’t have to cook – he selected a buffet.  I didn’t say anything to him that morning (gotta appreciate your spouse’s thoughtfulness!), but I prayed that God would give me wisdom in selecting foods from the buffet that would glorify Him and not stuff my body full of junk.  And you know what?  By that afternoon, my hubby had changed his mind – without me saying a word (imagine that!).  He decided that we could eat at home, save some dough (yippee!), and I still didn’t have to cook because we’d prepared well a few days before and had plenty in the fridge.  I was so delighted to eat a chicken breast sandwich topped with bleu cheese dressing, fresh spinach, and red grapes at home!  When I remarked to my hubby, “I definitely wouldn’t have gotten something this healthy at the buffet,” he agreed and we both laughed.

I am grateful that God wouldn’t allow me to eat myself to death – literally.  Why?  Because He has a purpose and a plan for my life that I must fulfill.  So it is with you, my friend.  If you’re facing something that seems absolutely insurmountable and you haven’t gotten victory over it the past 10 times you tried to overcome it, I encourage you to try one more time.  But this time, allow God to change your heart (give Him free reign, holding nothing back for yourself) so you can change your mind, and your lifestyle will begin to change.  He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.  I am a witness!

“But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.”

(Hebrews 11:6)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Less is More

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I should’ve known God was up to something that would create major change in me.  You know what tipped me off?  It wasn’t one particular “struck with a lightning bolt” moment.  But it was a gradual realization of, “Hey – something is different here!”  That “something different” is the reason I haven’t visited my co-workers’ candy dishes since the Christmas holidays…who knew that 20 miniature chocolates in one week (or in one day) would add up on your hips if left unattended???  Right – I should’ve known then, but now I know better, and I do better.  Allow me to share a couple of observations.

About a month ago, we went to a restaurant that serves chocolate mints after dinner.  Our server was kind enough to give us 2 for each person.  Now I remember a day when I would’ve taken the mints from my children so I could have more (I hate to admit it, but I guess that’s hoarding).  This time, I reached (out of habit) for one mint, then subconsciously jerked my hand back.  I remembered, “That was my old way of doing things; I really don’t want that candy, nor do I need the extra calories…nor do I desire to eat one and end up with an urge to finish off the rest of them.”  My family didn’t notice my mental conversation, but I did.  And I’m proud to report that the candies my children didn’t eat are still in a drawer in my kitchen.  I see them when I pull out twist ties, and they’re safe – it’s not even a temptation anymore.  I am grateful for God changing me from the inside out. 

As if to prove that it wasn’t a one-time deal, another test-type situation presented itself one afternoon at work.  I headed to the break room to refill my water bottle, passing by the “free” coffee and rich, calorie-laden hot cocoa.  Then I saw them – leftover cookies from a meeting.  Neatly preserved in a box.  And nobody was looking.  Oh sure, they’d been put there for anyone to help themselves – but that someone didn’t have to be me!  I took a peek to see what flavor presented itself – livin’ on the edge, right?  Peanut butter, with visible peanut butter chip chunks.  “Hmmm,” I mused as I inhaled, noticing how soft the cookies looked.  “Peanuts are healthy,” I reasoned.  Then I snapped back to reality, shut the box, and walked back to my desk with my full water bottle.  I didn’t really want or need a cookie, and that wasn’t what I’d gone to the break room for anyway.  I acknowledged it as just a distraction.  Kayren – 1 point, cookies – zero. God had made a way of escape for me. This time – thankfully – I took it.

“There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.”

(I Corinthians 10:13)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Gravity Works in My Favor

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For the first time in a VERY long time, the scale is actually reading about 10 pounds less…with me standing on it.  Who would’ve thought I’d actually see results this time?  Not me – at first.  Then I kept checking the scale week after week, and it was going down – a pound here, a pound there.  I was hesitant to believe it – and I definitely wasn’t gonna write about it in case I was just dreaming and someone had to shake me back to reality and say, “No honey, you’re still as heavy as you were – wake up!” 

At the beginning of the year, a good friend of mine told me she wanted to lose 40 pounds by her birthday in July.  It sounded rather impossible for me to apply her enthusiasm to my own need to lose the same amount – as my doctor had been gently nudging me to do (then firmly insisting) for the past few years.  Though I wasn’t convinced it could work for me this time, she chirped, “It breaks down to about 2 pounds a week” and I decided that was considerably more manageable to attack than 40 pounds in one fell swoop.  Plus, she said I’d inspired her to be more healthy (imagine that!), so because I wanted to be supportive of her efforts, I agreed to be her accountability partner as we built healthier habits into our daily lifestyles.

She has lost over 15 pounds and is well on her way to reaching her goal.  I’ve lost about 10 pounds (though I was really hoping more than I was believing I’d lose any weight at all), my knees don’t hurt anymore, and I’m feeling ready to run around in the yard with my children when the warm weather arrives.  It’s remarkable how changing your perspective can improve your quality of life!

I didn’t get liposuction (who has money laying around for that these days? and I certainly don’t want anyone carving on me like a Thanksgiving turkey), I didn’t get scammed and subsequently disappointed by the newest “miraculous fat melting pill/powder/beverage fad” (to take my money without delivering results), I haven’t starved myself (though I’m convinced that camels really can live off their humps, and I do have plenty of calories stored up), I haven’t missed any meals (just made the ones I eat healthier and more proportionate), and I have added a little exercise to my week (there’s always room for improvement).  Good ol’ fashioned discipline.  Taking in fewer calories than I burn off.  Not eating everything that comes across my path and isn’t nailed down.  I had to change my mind first – then my body followed.

Can you tell how incredulous I am about the whole thing?  It’s nothing short of amazing, in my opinion.  Yet, with the right input, you can have favorable results.  Since I’d been putting in junk, I was getting excess calories.  When I started putting in more fruit, veggies, and water – voila! – the excess pounds begin to melt away.  Not only am I responsible for taking thoughtful stewardship of my body, the temple of the Holy Spirit, I am also responsible for setting a godly example for others – including my children.  My lifestyle must witness louder than my words.  Finally, my convictions are translating into action and change.  And better health is just one of many benefits I’m reaping.

It all adds up…to less.  I am grateful that God is at work in my life.  Can you hear the chisels and jackhammers?

“Laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life.”

(I Timothy 6:19)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Humbly Clothed in Strength and Honor

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In spite of all my incessant ranting, raving, cajoling, and coaxing, “Take your baths…put your laundry in the hamper…brush your teeth…put Vaseline on your lips…turn the light out!” my children opened their precious hearts to unexpectedly bless me this evening.

As my daughter oohed and aahed over the results of yesterday’s $15 mani/pedi from the local beauty school, she summoned her brother to look at the fancy little design adorning my usually plain nails.  He liked them, too.  I felt special to be the center of their attention at the same time!  Then I glanced down at my legs and realized how ashy they were.  Like a broken record, I’m always reminding the children to put lotion on their legs and arms, and here I was able to scratch my name into my skin with a fingernail.  I sheepishly acknowledged that Mommy needed some lotion.

My son chirped, “I’ll put some on you, Mommy!”  Not to be outdone, my daughter ran to get the lotion bottle first and she started working on one leg.  I melted, reminiscing on the times I’d put lotion on their legs, too numerous to count.  My son went to get another bottle of lotion and started applying it to my feet.  If that wasn’t a modern day foot-washing or Alabaster Box moment, I don’t know what is!  It made the energy and effort put into serving God’s smallest people all the more worth it.  They beamed as they saw the smile spread across my face while they served with gladness.  Overwhelmed, I could see that they were following my example.  And their little warm hands were every bit as nice as the nail tech’s – with an extra dollop of love and a splash of affection added.  🙂

Even in light of my “fancy nails,” (which I’m enjoying as a fabulous departure from the ordinary), I believe that strength and honor are the most important things I can wear in the presence of my children.  By their actions, they rose up and called me blessed.  This moment combined with the faint trace of a rainbow I glimpsed this afternoon to create the closing of an utterly beautiful day.  I received it as a miracle.

“Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.  She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.  She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.  Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.”

(Proverbs 31:25-28)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

In Awe of Simple Beauty: Rainbows and Snow Shows

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I saw a rainbow this week (twice!!!) and I squealed with childlike delight and glee as I remembered how much God loves me.  In the seemingly mundane moment of walking from the commuter train to my car, I caught a glimpse of glory.  Time stood still, and I stood in awe of God’s greatness.  He pulled back heaven’s curtain long enough for me to be tickled pink in the midst of my daily routine.  Trust me – I appreciated the departure from the ordinary.  🙂

As if that weren’t enough, the rainbow was a precursor to some (more) unexpected snow…as my son called it, “the snow show.”  I thought that was a fitting description of the ensuing weather production, because God truly displayed His power through the tiny flakes.  How cleansing it was to stand in the midst of what started as tiny flurries grazing my eyelashes, but rapidly turned into an all-out snowfall.  I celebrated as His presence engulfed me…then I scurried inside to watch the accumulation from the safety of the other side of the window.

What “little thing” has touched your life lately?  This week, make a point to enjoy the wonderment of youthful astonishment.  God is speaking all around…are you listening?

“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:

So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.”

(Isaiah 55:9-11)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

The Power of a Compassionate Word

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Are you available when opportunity knocks – whether it benefits you or someone else?  Openings to share the love of Christ often show up in the most unexpected ways – at least they do in my life.  Take the other day, for instance, when I headed to the bank during my lunch break.  I wasn’t in a rush, but I wasn’t meandering either.  Then I noticed him – a brother puffing on a cigarette.

I’ve seen him on several occasions around the building I work in.  I suppose this time, I just felt compelled to speak to him.  Before I knew it, I boldly implored, “Brother, what are ya doin’ to yourself?!  I want you to have healthy, pink lungs.  You know we need all the Black men we’ve got!  I love Black men – I’ve got 2 of ‘em at home myself – a husband AND a son.”  At that instant, he dropped it on the ground and crushed it under his well-worn work shoe.  Stunned, I kinda did a double-take and asked, “What made you do that?” to which he responded, “What can I say to that?  I’ve gotta put it out.”  In my book, that was all the thanks I needed. 

I headed to the bank with new amazement for the sovereignty of God at work.  I was overwhelmed that He would use me to touch this brother’s life.  And humbled.  Though I’m definitely smoke-averse, I’m no caped crusader running around extinguishing every tobacco product I see.  (I wasn’t consciously aware that my impassioned plea might have been my personal kickoff for Black History Month).

As my dad (who works in a public high school) says about one of the students he reached out to, “I may not be able to save ‘em all, but he was my starfish that I threw back into the sea.  I made a difference to him.”  The entire world is waiting for us to show the compassion of Christ.  Sometimes that simply means taking the time to say a kind word – filled with the power and boldness of His Word.  I’m glad God answered my morning prayer, ordered my steps, and gave me an opportunity to share HIM with someone that day.  And I’m glad I didn’t miss it.

“For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.”

(Mark 11:23)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

A New Way of Walking

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This is very different indeed.  I used to think I owed it to myself to worry.  Yet, worrying accomplishes nothing productive.  And I’ve discovered that the less I obsess about something, the shorter time it takes for it to work itself out.  Amazing, isn’t it?  I know it sounds silly, but many of us live a significant portion of our lives – too much – wondering about what’s up the road and around the corner.

See, I’m a planner by nature.  Thankfully, the Lord saw fit to give me a husband who is very action-oriented.  Whenever he sees my eyebrows lift and my forehead start to crinkle up, he asks me, “What’s wrong, and what can you do about it?”  Not once does he join me in my grandiose “what if” planning, thinking, pondering, and contemplating until I’m completely preoccupied with the mental chess game I’ve set up inside my noggin in 10 seconds flat.  Instead, he gently guides me to think about the things I do have control over to modify whatever situation I may be facing.

So in this season, I’m resting in Christ, knowing that His Word illuminates the path I am to walk – and I don’t have to worry about it…at all.  As long as I walk in obedience, I’ll reach the destination He has appointed for me.

“Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein.”

(Jeremiah 6:16)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

Stop Stressin’!

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When God takes anxiety from you, you may realize that the situation hasn’t changed, but your response to the situation has changed.  How grateful I am to acknowledge that moment in our household finances.  Gone is the angst of wondering, “What’s coming next?”  The struggle with my spouse has subsided as he takes his rightful place as head of the household and I stay in my place of peace as his helpmeet.  As he has been educated in leading us along a sound, balanced path – financially and spiritually – I must move from fretfulness to trust.  I trust God to lead my husband.  Why?

My responsibility is to be a woman committed to prayer and intercession, asking God to impart His direction to my husband for our home.  This takes a lot of pressure off of me – the pseudo-SuperWoman trying to shoulder the load myself…yeah, the load never intended for me to carry!  It is certainly a different approach.  And the results are a breath of fresh air – order, rest, and joy.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

(Philippians 4:6-7)

© Copyright 2010 by Kayren J. Cathcart

A Mother’s Sacrifice…and Reward

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Like I do just about every 2 weeks, I’m sitting at the local beauty school waiting for my very long and thick-haired daughter to get her as-yet chemically untreated natural mane of crowning glory washed, conditioned, and braided by a lady with a little more patience and a lot more skill than me to do so.  The significant difference is that instead of reading and watching the clock between bouts of entertaining her for 4-5 hours while she gets coiffed, tonight I am springing an extra $8 to get pampered myself.  Granted, I am well able to wash and roller set my own hair (as I generally do between relaxers), but today I decided I’d enjoy the treat.  Wow – what have I been missing?!?  My scalp is way happy right about now as I sit under the dryer conditioning and waiting for my stylist to finish coloring someone else’s tresses.

As mothers, we often forget to allow ourselves time to be rewarded for the many sacrifices we make on a daily basis.  But when we remember, it really helps us to keep our serving and caring for others in perspective.  All giving without being replenished and restored leads to imbalance – honey, don’t I know it!!!  Yet, an occasional splurge (within reason, of course *wink, wink*) doesn’t hurt.  As a matter of fact, it helps.  When we feel relaxed, appreciated, and renewed, there’s no end to the benefits our families reap.  On the flip side, we all know what pent-up resentment coupled with overtiredness and frazzled feelings lead to…and that untimely explosion ain’t pretty!

So do yourself a favor and have that cup of coffee made by someone else; take an extra 10 minutes driving home to enjoy some different scenery; lock the door and luxuriate in that monthly (or quarterly) bubble bath.  Without guilt.  Because you’ve earned it.  If your family can attest to your sacrifices (and most of them speak for themselves), then you more than owe it to yourself to enjoy a reward from time to time.

Who knows?  Next time, I may even add on the $6 manicure.  LOL 🙂

  © Copyright 2009 by Kayren J. Cathcart

”She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.”

(Proverbs 31:27-29)